Monthly Archives: April 2010

And here comes the s*** storm.

I knew this was too easy. I knew something had to go wrong. I knew it.

You know that other shoe that I was waiting to drop, it dropped.

So, we didn’t invite fiance’s aunts on his dad’s side for several reasons. 1. His dad doesn’t like them and isn’t even on speaking terms with one. 2. They have been nothing but rude and mean to fiance his whole life. 3. Fiance can’t remember the last time he talked to them. Our wedding has limited space and we didn’t want to invite people who would just cause problems…his aunt and his dad would probably get into a fight within the first hour. We don’t need that. Fiance even asked his dad when we were putting together a guest list who needed to be invited and he said that the aunts didn’t need to be invited.

Fast forward to yesterday. Fiance gets a phone call from his dad and basically the aunts are complaining that they didn’t get invited. The RSVP cards were due last weekend. His dad says they probably won’t come, but should be invited. WHAT?? We already asked him about this and these women are just mean. No other way to put it. And, in the 4 years we’ve been together and the number of family dinners they have had, they have invited fiance ONCE and me never. I could run into one and wouldn’t know who it was.

Well, to satisfy everyone, we’re inviting them to the reception we are having here in the town we currently live in. We were already having one because of limited space at the wedding, so that my mother in law’s friends could come and family that wouldn’t be able to make the drive. Whatever. I hope they don’t come because they will do nothing but start problems.

And then his brother.

I could write an entire book on his brother. 20 years old. Got kicked out of college because of his .5 GPA two semesters in a row. Pretty sure he’s been lying about turning in job applications. Sits at home all day doing nothing. It’s bad. And causing a lot of drama and stress for my MIL.

Well, brother has a girlfriend. An insanely immature girlfriend. Who still acts like she’s 13. And can’t seem to hold appropriate conversations. Ever. I mean, at dinner with MIL and fiance’s stepdad, her friend was talking about how much the different things at KFC cost (why, I have NO idea…again, the immaturity) and she says (and remember the audience and that she hasn’t been around for more than 2 months and they only were officially together for about a month now) “Well you can’t buy these breasts for $2.50” ans she cups her breasts at the dinner table.

When did people decide this was acceptable?? It’s not. Never ever ever.

So, no one likes her. Except the brother. She’s weird, can’t act right, wears clothes that are so inappropriate that when we went to lunch with MIL and brother and his girlfriend, I thought fiance was going to leave the restaurant because he was so embarrassed to be seen with her. I can’t even explain it.

And please don’t think I’m just being mean. I tried. I tried to talk to her and be nice, but it’s ridiculous. Act like your 20. And don’t make sex comments in front of your new boyfriend’s mom. The 3rd time you meet her.

Well, MIL decided she would not be coming to the wedding.

But then I get a text message last night from brother-in-law. (PS I know we’re not married, but since I won’t use their names, it’s MUCH easier to just say they’re my in-laws already.)

He asks me if there is space for a guest of his. My response: Ummm…I’m not sure. Ask your mom. I’m sure she would know.

It’s bad. Fiance is furious because we have A LOT going on the weekend of the wedding. Rehearsal dinner Sat., wedding Sunday, which is an ALL day event, then baseball tickets for Monday’s game with a bunch of the family…along with all the errands and running around that needs to happen. And all they will want to do is running around and playing tourist since they aren’t from the city and we don’t need to worry about them getting lost because he has NO sense of direction, getting to places on time, and being in a good mood and acting like the grown up he is.

It’s a problem. And one that I don’t know the answer to. We don’t have any extra ballgame tickets for her. We were planning on putting his brother at the table with his parents so he would be more comfortable, so that then puts her at one of the head tables.

I don’t want to be rude, but fiance is so very against her being there and I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to put my MIL in a bad position, but I also don’t want anything unnecessarily making the fiance mad or uncomfortable that weekend. He’s already stressed. Don’t need anything more.

Why now? A month beforehand and we have to get stuff to the caterer at the beginning of next week.

We’re supposed to go to the MIL’s in a little bit, so I guess we’ll see how it goes. It just makes me uncomfortable.

Enough whining. Other than I burnt myself to death at the tanning bed yesterday. I’m a lobster. Won’t be getting anymore color for a while.

What would you do? Did you have any family drama when it came to your wedding? How did you deal?

{New} Teacher {New} Wife

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The First Shower

This past weekend I had my first bridal shower. I was so very excited. I mean, we have been planning and planning since January 2009. That’s almost a year and a half of planning without anything happening. The whole wedding almost doesn’t seem real.

But, finally we had an event that says we’re getting close to the big day. I just still can’t imagine it. Did anyone else feel like that? I have a feeling it won’t REALLY hit me till the day of the wedding.

I mean, opening presents and not sharing the attention is different since I always share my birthday with my brother, but it’s still odd.

I know we’re only 33 days….

I’ll just stop analyzing now. I might drive myself nuts doing that.

I loved my cupcakes. Red velvet and the cute little flower decorations made them perfect for me!

Cute centerpieces that were then given to all the moms ( my mom, stepmom, and mother in law)

This shower at home was fairly small. All of my mom’s sisters and such live all over the place, so it is understood that they won’t be at a shower…and this goes for all the kids. My mom’s two best friends threw the shower and I loved it. I liked that I knew everyone there and I was so very appreciative of them coming to the shower.

My favorite gift from the shower was one we didn’t register for. My mom had a chenille blanket embroidered with my soon to be last name and our wedding date. The lettering was done in our wedding color. I love it. I am a HUGE fan of blankets so this was perfect and it’s the softest thing ever.My mom said she has had it for a year. She’s so sweet.

I thought I had more pictures that I wasn’t in, but I don’t. I’ll try to work on that.

Also, if you read a couple posts ago, still don’t know what to do about this bachelorette party this weekend. My good friend A (which I will be a bridesmaid for in July) is going to be out of town, so she won’t be going. She and I both feel awkward with these other girls because of everything that has happened. So no one to back me up.

Also, this is our ONLY free weekend between now and the wedding, and we would like to spend some time just relaxing and not having any other commitments. I think I’m leaning towards not going and then praying it doesn’t cause a huge blow up. I despise pointless drama.

See why I’m friends with guys? If this were a group of guys, I could say, “Hey, I can’t make it. Sorry, but I’ll see you at the wedding.” It would be over and no problem.

Oh, well.

I have another shower in two weeks, her wedding in three, and my bach party in 4. Very excited.

*New Teacher New Wife

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Filed under Pictures, wedding

Credit Cards, Watches and Weights

This post is a little eclectic. Fair warning…

So, while this isn’t what I usually post about or plan on posting about, I have some money questions.

Anyone have suggestions for a good credit card? I would like a cash back card or a reward card, but I’m really not sure which one to choose or anything like that, so I put to you…help? I have pretty good credit, so yeah.

Also, I’ve been working on a wedding gift for the fiance. I already know what he’s getting me, which isn’t traditional, but I know what I wanted and it was expensive, so he wanted to make sure it is the right thing. So, I want to get him a watch, but holy cow.

I know how much mine is costing, and I have budgeted for his about the same amount, maybe even a little more, but watches are EXPENSIVE. I was looking at brands that weren’t Rolex, and it was intense and mind blowing. I want to get him a nice one, but I think I’m going to have to reevaluate what “nice” one means. Anyone have any suggestions or what did you get for your husband? Or did you even exchange gifts? I want to treat him to something he will really love, but we have three years of law school debt ahead, I don’t  need to be in debt for a present.

So, I’ve mentioned a couple times about my need and desire to lose some weight and I’m trying to be good. Not that my love of margaritas is helping, but I’m trying. So, meet my new best friends:

Bill and Bob kick my butt

They may only be 5 pound weights, but I do lots of reps, which is more important for me to get the arms slimmed down. Also, I would have put a picture of my ball which I adore for ab workouts and all sorts of stuff, but at some point between last night and right now, fiance deflated it to get it out of the living room and save space. Doesn’t he know I have a motivation problem and it helps me when it is in plain sight and I can’t get away from it??

Also, some girl advice. ( I told you this post was going to be r.a.n.d.o.m.)  One of my roommates got engaged in December after she has said for as long as I’ve known her that she didn’t want to get engaged. Also, she gave me a really hard time about my wedding because it had “so many people” and we were spending “so much money” and I was letting my mom plan everything. Which isn’t true because my mom has been a saint and even though she did the leg work, EVERY SINGLE DETAIL she has called me about and we have discussed at length. Again, a 30 minute conversation about stamps is a little much.

Well, she gets engaged to a guy that, by the date of their wedding, they will not have even known each other a year. They met at one of our friend’s wedding which was last June. Their wedding is May 15th (yes…two weeks before mine…which is a whole other story of girl drama). So, it’s been awkward. Roommate and I are also bridesmaids in another friends wedding in July. (Roommate also picked the EXACT same location for her wedding as our friend, even though friend has been engaged since LAST July…and it’s not even roommate’s church–see? drama.)

Not one of the girls in our circle of friends has really shown any interest in my wedding other than finding ways to critique it. (this exclude the girl who I’m a bridesmaid for…she’s fantastic) Not one asked about a bachelorette party and I have had to message several of them to see if they are coming to mine because they didn’t RSVP on time.

But, then I get a message about helping to throw a bachelorette party for roommate that is getting married  right before me. Help??? I’m not a bridesmaid…she asked a couple other girls in the group, but not me, which is honestly fine because I have enough going on and not the finances to be a good bridesmaid. I mean, I wouldn’t min chipping in for her drinks and dinner, but I have no desire to spend a hundred bucks for a hotel room that I don’t plan staying in or a limo. I mean, honestly, I’m a little ticked because they expect me to drop everything for her and her wedding, even though they were nothing but rude about mine.

So, what do I do? Do I go and fake enthusiasm? Do I back out, claiming other commitments that night? If I go, how much am I going to be expected to chip in? Again, I’m not a bridesmaid, so what are my responsibilities?

I appreciate any and all advice. Thank you.

New Teacher. New Wife.

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Girlfriends

I’ve always been one to hang out with the boys. I’m not sporty or a tom boy, but I have always connected more with guys and been able to form much closer friendships with them.

My best friend in kindergarten was a boy. I was the only girl at his birthday parties for three years. Then he moved. It was heartbreaking. Oh 6-year-old romance….

But that trend has followed me until this very day. I mean, I couldn’t come up with bridesmaids, but other than my brother, my other “bride’s man” is my best friend since 4th grade. We didn’t go to college in the same city ( or even state), and he now lives even farther away for grad school, but when we talk, it’s like nothing has ever changed. We may not talk all the time, but if there is every anything going on, we can pick up the phone and call.

Aren’t I supposed to have that kind of relationship with a girl? Aren’t I supposed to be with my maid of honor constantly by this time and be talking with her about wedding plans and babies?

I mean, I have girl friends. I have a group of four who have taken over my bachelorette party and planned some surprise night, which I am so appreciative of, especially since they aren’t in the wedding. But….

I don’t feel I can call and just chat or talk about problems. I mean, the fiance and I are great, but sometimes he annoys me and I just need to vent.

And now, the problem is about to get even trickier. All the guys that I’m friends with are even in fiance’s fraternity, so there is a level of understanding that I’m taken and he knows it’s not a problem. I probably can get away with being a little flirty because so many of them have taken roles of big brothers, so there isn’t any awkwardness of “does he like me?”  “does she like me?”

But here we are. About 4 months from moving to a new place, where neither of us knows anyone and we both are going to have to make some new friends. Easy for him. Lots of guys in law school. I’m sure he’ll find plenty that he connects with and want to hang out with. Me? Well….not going to be as easy.

I mean, how comfortable would your significant other be if you were out hanging out with guys he didn’t know, without him?? My point exactly.

So, what do I do? I’m sure I will find some girls that I connect to, but in my 23 years on this earth, I have yet to find a true female friend. In high school, I may not have chosen the best groups, but even they had close friends. I just wasn’t one of them. I always seemed to get walked on and used as a source of jokes. I had a “best friend” crush an entire box of exlax into a soda while at a party and sent me to the hospital. Aren’t teenagers sweet??

So, I turn to you. What do I do? Do I forge friendships that I’m not going to be comfortable with, or do I do what comes naturally and face, possibly, problems in my new, and already challenged marriage due to law school? I do not do well when I don’t have friends or people to turn to and I’m not going to be able to turn to the fiance as much because he will be under his own stress and pressures and won’t be able to deal with me and my girly whining.

I feel like that’s what I’m doing now, but I’m terrified. I’m terrified of being lonely the rest of my life. I know I will have my husband, but I need more than that. He has his friends and his own things going on. I need mine. I’m just not sure what to do.

So, I put it you to see if you have any advice. Maybe someone out there has been through the same thing.Maybe.

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42 days?

42 days. Really? I can’t believe it.

Went home this weekend. {Like I will be doing constantly. Gas should be cheaper. Or I should get a “frequent traveler card”}

Took the dreaded test that I have been complaining about for 2 months. Not sure what to think. It was tough, but I felt I did okay. Let’s just hope I passed so I don’t have to take it again. 4 weeks and we will know.

I did the run through for my hair for the wedding today. It went well, I guess. My hair is so think that it just takes forever and I’m afraid the big curls I’m doing are going to fall out that day. Ehh….what happens will happen. That needs to be my motto for the next few months.

Didn’t get to spend as much time with the boy of mine because of a silly baseball game that went into 20 innings. ARE YOU SERIOUS??? That’s TWO entire baseball games plus some. And he said they stopped serving any food/beer/drinks during the 7th inning….about 13 innings too soon apparently. So I didn’t even meet up with him till almost 11pm on Saturday and then we were both exhausted from our long days and went to sleep. Oh well.

We will be headed home this weekend as well. Except, this is for my bridal shower! Ahhhh…so very excited.

Finally, after 1.5 years of planning planning planning, there is finally an event that signifies this little shindig is VERY close. I am very very excited. I feel like a 5 year old.

But….instead of a cake, because I saw no need for a whole cake, the wonderful women who are putting on the shower are making my favorite cupcakes:

Moist. Cream cheese icing. All in a delicious, individual serving...yummm.

I love red velvet cupcakes. They are so delicious.

*****

So, was going to write more, but just got a phone call that I am needed to substitute tomorrow, so I must go shower and get to bed ASAP. Already past my usual work day bed time. Ooops.

So I will elaborate more later.

Again, does anyone realize I am getting married in 42 days????? I’m excited, but nervous….must calm down.

Good night. Need to make some money tomorrow….

*New Teacher. New Wife.*

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Guilty Pleasure

I’m drooling. And so very glad fiance isn’t home right now. He would be making fun of me. And then reminding me about money.

So, my wedding is basically planned and done. Other than things that can’t be completed until the time comes, we’re done. Contracts signed, cakes/flowers/band/food all picked out. Most brides {I think} are still stressing at this point, but thanks to my mother’s SUPER organization skills, we started on things immediately.

So, one might think that there is no need to be perusing bridal websites. Well, that one might be wrong.

My dream job is to be a wedding planner. I would LOVE to have that job. All the planning. The beautiful and intricate details. The stories that go along with the couple.

I’d be in career heaven.

However, the practical parents said I had to pick a reasonable major and one I could find a job in. (If they only knew about the budget cuts 5 years ago….)

So, I’m a teacher. I like it. But I can’t help from looking at anything and everything wedding.

So, Say Yes to the Dress on TLC is my guilty pleasure. {also, they are making Fridays all about weddings on TLC, so we know where I will be on Friday…}

So, sitting here watching the show and wishing I would have had the budget to fly to New York, go to Kleinfelds and buy a dress. But, we definitely couldn’t afford that. Well, I get curious and start looking at their website.

Bad idea. Very bad idea.

Again, drooling. There are dresses that I would give anything to even try on. Well, not anyone’s life, but it would be a dream to get a dress from there.I mean, am I the only one who dreams of this? Probably.

I mean, I love my dress, but there are always better in much higher price ranges. But, we got engaged December 2008, and I had my dress within 6 days of the engagement. It was planned. Mom and I just wanted to see what was out there and prices and what I liked. 2 hours and I had my dress. I do like it. And it will be pretty.

I did this at prom in high school also. Second guessing myself. I must stop torturing myself.

I will look at stationary and cool venues and details other brides are doing.

So, tonight I will dream of this:

Make the sash champaigne and I'm in.

Thank for dealing with my girly-ness. Back to the real world….

Can we renew vows in like 10-15 years, can I get a dress? I’ll dye it so it’s not white…. 🙂

New Teacher. New Wife.

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Ready for a change

It’s one of those weeks where everything either upsets me, makes me mad, or I start second guessing everything I do. Rollercoaster for the emotions.

I thought I would have gotten a call by now to sub at some point this week, but I haven’t and it makes me nervous. I NEED to be working. I can’t afford not to.

I was supposed to have a sub job for tomorrow. She called while I was in the doctor’s office, so I called her back and left a message that I was available. I was excited because it was at the school I student taught at, so I would get to see the teachers and students that I miss a lot. Well, last night she called back while I was in the shower and left a message that she didn’t find my message till later and she had already found another sub.

WHAT?? Why wouldn’t you check your messages BEFORE looking for another person? I’m frustrated. It’s probably not a huge deal, but this week it is.

I also decided to spend some more time at my apartment since I haven’t been there in almost a month. I’m ready to leave again. The roommates drive me nuts and someone has put something down the sink that makes the entire kitchen smell like, well, I won’t tell you what it smells like, but it’s awful.

I even made food for all of them last night in an attempt to be nice. They ate it. But no “thank you”. I guess I shouldn’t do things for recognition, but a thank you would have been appreciated.

Also, trying desperately to get my diet and exercise schedule back on track. It’s killing me. I’m not going to be a size 2 by the wedding, or ever for that matter, but I would like to lose some and get my arms toned up before the wedding. I don’t want to hate all of my wedding pictures because I look HUGE in them. I actually have enjoyed my workouts. It’s the eating that is sabotaging my efforts. I mean, grilled chicken or pizza? Pizza sounds MUCH more appetizing. And the fiance is back to cycling 4 times a week, so he can eat practically whatever he wants because he will burn it all off. It’s just not fair.

I really need to buckle down and find some motivation within myself. I need to look at my long term goals, and not just what I want right now. Not only do I want to look good for wedding pictures, I want to be healthy. I want to start cycling and be able to keep up with him. I want to have the energy for when we have children so I can play with them. Also, I don’t want to add pregnancy weight on top of weight that I want to lose.

Not only in my diet, I need to get to work on finding job openings and applying, which can take about 3 hours per application. YIKES!

Okay. Done whining. Going to go walk and then hit the books again. In 4 more days, I won’t have to talk about studying, at least for a while! Yay!

New Teacher. New Wife.

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