The Groove

In May, Mr. A and I will have been married for two years. TWO YEARS!

I know. This is very short compared to many of you, but I can’t believe two whole years have gone by. I still remember our wedding day perfectly.

While it sounds cliche, and some people will criticize, my husband is my best friend. This doesn’t mean that I don’t have other close friend, but there is no one that I trust more and no one knows me better.

To some, we seem like complete opposites. I’m getting a Master’s in literature, while he got an MBA in a year and is in his second year of law school. I love bad reality television while my husband would rather shoot nails into his eyes than watch an episode of The Bachelor or The Real World. I love fiction (obviously) and I can’t remember the last nonfiction book he read. He’s athletic. I’m not. He’s a great cook. I’m mediocre. He’s a neat freak. I’m far from.

But we complement each other. We balance each other out. I’m an emotional person and he typically keeps things bottled up. I’m outgoing and kind of loud. He’s much more reserved until he gets to know people. I bring some funny goofy into his life and he levels me out and instills work ethic in me. We believe in and support each other 100%.

But that being said, we are far from perfect.

And the first year of marriage?! YIKES.

Yes, a lot of that was the doubled stress of his first year in law school, living in a new place, and my unemployment, followed by very underemployment.

We were kind of a mess. And argued more than we ever did. And while we were still supportive, we each had too many other issues to really be there for one another.

Yes. I had a few very rough days where I wondered if we were really supposed to be married. Those were not good days.

Luckily, we’ve finally found our groove.

We are closer and happier than ever before. I believe we have fallen even more in love, or at least, I have. We are communicating so much better and I can’t remember the last real fight we’ve had.

That doesn’t mean we don’t bicker or get annoyed. We do. Remember, he’s a clean freak and I am not. This causes problems. (But then again, if I have to explain how to load the dishwasher again or remind him to get his clothes out of the dryer…well, I don’t know but something)

But in our second year, we’ve figured out how to work through them. We’ve learned not to push all the buttons when we’re aggravated. We’ve learned to not let our stubbornness lead to hurting the other just to have the last word. We can both be pretty strong willed and we are much better at putting that aside and being willing to say, “I’m sorry”.

We both are pretty goofy and the fun side of marriage has been wonderful. We are able to have a lot more fun together. We love to play with Scout and sleep in and watch movies and go for walks and just be together.

Yes, this is sappy. I know. But it’s where we are right now.

Everyday I get more and more excited to spend my life with this man. To have kids with him and travel and build a house and grow old with him. He’s my support when I need him and he tells me the truth when I need to hear it.

I like the groove we’re in. Now I wonder if his clothes are still in the dryer…

A Million Things

I have about 20 different blog posts that I want to write, but things keep happening so quickly that I can’t keep up, so I’m doing a brain dump post in hopes to touch on all of it. I don’t have the time or patience to write full posts on each of them. (Also, if I have a million typos that I miss, my pointer finger on my right hand is all messed up since my fingernail separated from the skin. It hurts pretty bad, which makes typing hard, so forgive me. I’ll try to catch them.)

 

* This past weekend I headed home and it was one of those rare weekends where everything went well and I got to spend some great time with some of my favorite people. My best guy friend A graduated from grad school this May and is at home before he leaves for California in a couple weeks. He was one of my bride’s men in our wedding and I was so excited to see him. I had dinner with him and his parents on Friday night at my favorite wine bar. And they have the best brick oven pizzas. His dad was the one that married Mr. A and I, and since A and I have been friends since 5th grade, we go way back and his family is just so wonderful.

Saturday morning I got to have breakfast with my very best girl friend R, and we got to catch up. She and I may not see each other for a couple months, but when we do, it’s like nothing ever changed and we just fill each other in on everything that has happened. She is dating an amazing guy and engagement and a wedding is in their very near future. I now have 3 weddings for next year and all are for very close friends. I might be more excited to get to be there on their special days than I was on mine. The pressure won’t be on me and I will get to relax and enjoy.

Saturday night, my mom got some free baseball tickets, so my brother, his girlfriend, A, and I all went and had a great time. My team came back and won in the 9th inning. Always makes for some excitement and fun. And, hello, NACHOS! heh

* I tweeted last week that my brother was being sneaky and was talking about some sort of surprise. The hints he gave immediately had me thinking that he and his long time girlfriend were going to get married. It would not be surprising if they just went to the courthouse and did something very small. However, this was not the case. His surprise was taking me to see The Little Mermaid being performed by the off Broadway touring company. This may seem goofy, but my brother always jokes that he knows all the words to it and The Lion King since I used to watch them over and over every weekend. He thought it would be fun for us to go now that we are older, friends, and could have a beer while watching. It was a sweet bonding night for us and I truly have THE most amazing big brother. He will get his own post one day soon. He deserves it and so much more.

* Speaking of weddings, my butt needs to get in gear because I will need some very cute dresses and these arms need some good workouts.

* Unpacking is taking its sweet sweet time. And torturing me along the way. Kitchen and bathroom are the only two rooms that are completely unpacked, organized, and free of clutter and crap that still needs to be gone through. Not sure what to do with stuff in the living room yet. The bedroom and office upstairs are going to be the biggest projects, so I think I am going to tackle those and plan on getting them done before I leave to visit Mr. A next week. Here’s hoping.

* And I’m waiting to post apartment pictures until I get things organized and put away so I can do before and after pictures at the same time. No point in posting pics of an empty apartment with no way to show all the work that’s been done to fix it up. It won’t be fully complete for a while because I need to stretch the buying of a few things over some time so that it doesn’t break our bank account. I know I will need some decorating help.

* I hate admitting this, but it looks like the husband and I are planning on staying in this apartment for the next two years. I love the apartment, but it doesn’t allow dogs, and I REALLY thought we would get one next year. Actually, i originally thought we would get one this year, but since we had to sign leases in January, and money and everything else was so up in the air, that we couldn’t fathom agreeing to pay more for an apartment when we weren’t even sure we would have the money to even get a dog. And after this moving nightmare, we really would like to stay in the same place for more than a year. I haven’t live in the same place for more than a year for the past 6 years. I moved every year or every semester at times. It will be nice to actually set up a little home and decorate and all that. And maybe we will be able to save money so when we graduate, we can move to a nice place in whatever city we decide on and then get a dog where we settle.

* The thought of not getting a dog for another two years truly breaks my heart. It’s something I’ve wanted so badly for so long that I actually ache inside thinking about it. Lame? Yes. But also very true. Our apartment does allow cats, but I am crazy allergic to them. I have considered just taking a Zyrtec everyday and going for it, but my cat allergy is pretty bad and I would hate to get one and then it still make me miserable. I don’t ever want to be one of those people who get a pet and then can’t take care of it.

* Still on the pet thing, very tempted to get a bunny. I JUST WANT SOMETHING FURRY THAT I CAN PLAY WITH AND SNUGGLE AND TAKE CARE OF!!! Gosh. Any of you ever had a bunny? Thoughts?

* The cars in our family decided that they too hated Mondays and thought it best to screw with Mr. A and I. Mine started doing this thing that when I put it in reverse (I drive a manual), I lose my entire dashboard- no speedometer, no fuel gauge, no turn signal, and worst of all, no blowers or air conditioner. It wouldn’t even blow hot air just to have some circulation. So I would have to change the fuse after I reversed my car out of whatever parking spot I was in. And I would have to do this every time I had to back up. So today, I drove back home so that I could switch cars with my step-dad and the shop he works for can work on my car and try to get it fixed. Nearly 5 hours of driving roundtrip after making the drive home yesterday did not make me a happy camper.

And then Mr. A’s car got towed. He says the spot had lines like every other spot, but they claimed he was in the exit ramp of the parking garage. He texted me a picture of the spot where he had been parked and it looked legal to me, but since he had no bargaining power since he’s an out-of-towner with no other way of getting around, he had to pay the $200 fee to get his car back. After paying for a cab to take him to the tow place.  He was not happy at all. Especially after his car got locked in the parking garage on Friday when he left it there while going to the baseball game with people from work. It was not his weekend with cars.

* This upcoming weekend is going to be a great one. On Thursday, I head to Mville. Mr. A’s best friend G’s girlfriend, C and I will be getting in line around 5pm to see the midnight showing of the last Harry Potter movie. We already have our tickets, but people start getting in line to get good seats. Also, it’s just kind of fun to be with a bunch of people who are all as excited as you are about the same thing. We will get food and bring books and magazines and cards and entertain ourselves. My mother in law said she would bring us food if we wanted. Last time, people ordered pizza to their place in line. And then I will ball like a little baby when the movie is over. Not only because the ending is sad (no, I didn’t give a damn thing away, so chill out), but also because this is the end of an empire and a huge chunk of my child and young adulthood.

Then, I will sleep in on Friday since I probably won’t even get home until about 4am. That night, my MIL and I are going to see Bad Teacher. We both wanted to see it and since my step-FIL is not the type to go to the movies, we’re making a date night out of it. And then I will giggle at the people who will ultimately be in line for the HP movie on Friday. Maybe I should shout out the ending for those who didn’t read the books…  ;o)

Saturday my awesome Mville hair stylist has fit me in for a Brazilian Blowout. I know there was some controversy, but I did my own research and asked her a MILLION questions, and I’m going with it. I’m excited since my hair is truly unmanageable in this horrendous humidity. I can spend an hour straightening and smoothing and putting product in my hair, and 10 minutes outside and it looks like I just rolled out of bed. It’s infuriating since I do want to look like I care and try to look nice. And with heading to the very humid southern state next week, I  thought this would be a good time to do it. Also, I still have the rest of July, August, and September. All still hot months. I don’t plan on doing this constantly, mostly because it’s expensive, but if I like it, it might become a summer thing.

And after my fun hair appointment, my MIL and I are headed to the pool for the rest of the day to sun, drink margaritas, and have a girls’ day. Her friends are meeting us there and it should be a blast. Sunday will also be spent at the pool before I head home Sunday night. Hoping for a little sun on my pale skin and to just get to relax.

* If you have figured out or I’ve told you where Mr. A is, and where I will be visiting next week, PLEASE send me an e-mail with some restaurant suggestions, places to visit, etc. PLEASE. Mr. A hasn’t gotten out much, and I will have all day long while he’s at work to entertain myself, so I need help. HELP.

 

I think that’s it. A lot is going on, and before I know it, GA training will be starting and I’ll be in class once again. This summer is just flying by. And I’m pretty much loving it, but cannot wait for my husband to return. Sure do miss him.

Moving: The Aftermath

I really can’t believe my marriage has survived this.

Actually, I can. I’m being dramatic. But I’ve had moments that I wanted to pay for a second apartment so I could have one on my own.

I loathe, just like most people, moving. LOATHEEEEE.

There really aren’t words strong enough for how much I hate it.

Probably also comes from my moving back and forth between houses every week when I was younger.

AND YOU GUYS. How in the world do two young people have so much crap?!?!

I mean, we’ve lived in college dorms and college apartments. We still live in a college town in apartments that aren’t that big, yet we probably have enough things to fill a small house.

Luckily, we weren’t moving very far, so it was a little easier on me since I had to do it on my own. Even better, my MIL lent me her SUV to use instead of my teeny tiny car, and that made a HUGE difference.

However, if I ever get to pick a move date in the future, it will be during the winter when it’s nice a cold. Moving in 94 degree temperatures with 100% humidity is pure hell. Add in steps to the front door and now having an apartment with a second floor, and it was NOT fun.

I started moving on Tuesday, and by Friday, I thought my lower back was going to explode. I still need to schedule my massage…

Mr. A came home Thursday night and we finished moving things. I had basically everything done except for furniture and some miscellaneous things. We moved the televisions and set up the air mattress and stayed in the new apartment.

Also, pretty sure we put the fewest miles EVER on a rented Uhaul. A grand total of SEVEN. Seven miles folks. We only had to put one gallon of gas back in it. It was more miles back and forth to the rental place than between our apartments. We were done with the truck in 3 hours. Too bad they don’t prorate when you don’t use it for a whole day.

We got things mostly functional, but I didn’t want to spend my last day with Mr. A unpacking, so I told him that I would deal with it after he left so we could enjoy some time doing fun things.

BIG MISTAKE.

Yes, I’m glad that I got to spend time with him, but holy crap. Unpacking might be worse than packing.

The kitchen is the only room that is completely unpacked. The rest of the apartment? Not so much.

This fun pile is definitely still in our living room. Do I know what’s in those boxes? Not really. The stuff in the background is blocking a closet door. Luckily, the closet doesn’t have hardly any space, so I’m not missing much. Someone want a rockband drum set? Because I’m ready to just get rid of it. We played it for a while, but now, not really. It’s in my way.

These are the stairs. Doesn’t look too bad. Those two boxes are things that I need to take to Goodwill and such. Mr. A will freak out if I turn the stairs into a catch-all, so I’m trying to not get into that habit.

But the first pile is immediately to the right of the stairs, and until it’s moved, I can’t put our entryway table there, so the stairs it is. And they are quite convenient for purses and things that eventually need to go upstairs. 🙂

And the upstairs.

Please don’t report me to Hoarders.

This is utterly embarrassing. But this is currently what a corner of our bedroom looks like.

It’s clothes and miscellaneous crap that I need to find a home for. We went from a two bedroom apartment where we basically used the second room as storage for things we never planned on unpacking. We now only have one bedroom, and while there’s more room, we no longer have a room to jam stuff.

And I’m just being lazy and enjoying my time off. I promise it will  get put away. Probably early next week, but only because I’m going home this weekend. I’m in no rush because I know what works for me and how I operate. The longer I stare at it, the more I will hate it and will ensure that I take care of it the right way, and not just half-ass it. It’s a process folks.

Also, I’m coming off of just PACKING AND MOVING all of this. I give myself a week to not have to touch it. Eventually I will need more clothes, so it will happen. (And by shaming myself here on the blog, it will have to get done so I can take real apartment pictures to post for you all!)

So, there’s been a lot of sitting on the couch this week. Yes, being lazy, but I’m allowing it for myself. Do I deserve it? Doubtful. But my husband doesn’t come home until August 17th. As long as it’s done before then so he doesn’t leave me for being a lazy bum, it’s all good. I just won’t show him living room images on Skype. No need to worry him.

For now, I will watch SATC, drink wine, order takeout, and schedule my massage. I sure am lucky.

Hypocrite

I have an admission folks.

I, NewTeacherWife, am a hypocrite.

Why you ask? Well, really, you wouldn’t know.

You see, about 4 days ago I was typing a post about how much I was enjoying my alone time. I was going on and on about how even though I missed him, I was enjoying spending time by myself. I went and got a manicure. I could watch endless hours of Sex and the City. I could eat a late dinner, even if it was just cereal. I slept in the middle of the bed and hogged all the blankets and the pillows. I even went to a movie alone. A movie!! Alone!!

The post was all about spending the time, very clichely, finding myself and learning more about me and what I like.

And this this crazy year and all that I had gone through emotionally and mentally, the alone time was nice.

It wasn’t like I didn’t see him for 6 weeks. He came up on the weekends or I went down to Mville during the week when I didn’t work. So it was a nice balance of alone time and spending time with my husband.

I wrote out this whole, wonderful post and just hadn’t finished it, so it didn’t get posted. I was planning on writing the ending and letting all you blog readers read it.

But then today happened.

And what is so special about July 3rd?

No, I didn’t spend the day on the lake or at a BBQ with friends and family. I was not sunbathing by the pool.

No.

My husband left for Other State, (the REALLLLY big state 🙂 ) at 5am this morning. We woke up at 4:30, I talked to him while he showered. I made sure he hadn’t left anything crucial behind. We loaded the car with the snacks and drinks we bought the day before.

And we said our goodbyes.

I guess not goodbyes, but “see you soon”s and “call me if you’re bored”s and “let me know when you get there”s.

I didn’t cry, but I got a little choked up as he drove away. But it was also 5am, I was exhausted, and I headed back to bed. I said my prayers that he would have a safe trip, set my alarm for 9am and drifted back to sleep.

9am rolled around and I called him to check on his progress. More so I knew he hadn’t run into any problems and see if he had hit any traffic. He was chipper and in Arkansas. It was flying by and he was doing great.

And then it hit me. He was in Arkansas. And on his way to be even farther from me.

This is truly such an amazing and wonderful thing for him. I’ve said it a million times, but this is such a fabulous opportunity for him that there was never even a second where I didn’t want him to go.

Even today. I want him to be there. I want him to get these experiences and opportunities and make these connections.

But today, I’ve been a little mopey.

I’m not crying or balled up on the couch. I ordered some Chinese food and I’ve been watching SATC all afternoon. (Except when I went to Target and then got rained in for 30 minutes since I couldn’t see 4 feet past the door.)

I’m fine. I really am.

It’s just that even though he was in Mville, he was only an hour and 40 minutes away. I saw him on the weekends and he was still very accessible. I think that’s why it was easier to have all that alone time- I wasn’t truly alone.

But now? He’s, at minimum, a 12 hour car ride, away. 5 states separate us.

Other than Skype, I will not get to see him for 3 weeks.

And yes, I’m totally coming off as the whiny girl who apparently can’t be without her husband. And that kind of bothers me because that’s not who I am.

Marriage has just been so wonderful. I do love having him around and having someone to joke with and grocery shop with and go out to dinner with.

I guess these next 3 months will truly show what I’ve got and how much of an “independent woman” I really am.

For now, pass the chocolate ice cream and wine and turn up SATC.

Surreal

As I sit here in my apartment, everything is very slowly sinking in.

Tonight, I wrote up a moving week list. It’s two freaking pages long.

And no, I didn’t just list everything to pack. Packing is probably one of the things listed on there the least.

I have about a million errands to run tomorrow so that things go as smoothly as possible.

Deal with getting water turned on at new place, off at old place. Get mail forwarded. Maybe go get driver’s license changed. Start packing kitchen stuff. Reserve our Uhaul for Friday. (Speaking of which, is renting a Uhaul like renting a car where you have to be 25?)

And that’s just Monday.

I keep telling everyone that I’m fine with packing and moving by myself, but today, it seems overwhelming. I look around and holy crap do we have a lot of crap. Our apartment isn’t even that big. Geeze.

And I think it’s just weird to be moving into OUR new apartment by MYSELF. I’m picking up keys alone. Working on furniture arrangements alone. Packing and deciding what to keep and what to toss, alone. I think it’s just a lot to process right now.

I guess it wouldn’t be so bad if moving was all I was doing. But I just quit my job as well. No, no, no. Not questioning that decision in the least, but it’s still a little surreal and hasn’t sunk in. I keep thinking, “When is my next shift?” Or about what sale is going on or discounts. And when I drive by it hasn’t sunk in that I will only ever walk into that building as a consumer and I won’t be the one required to talk to customers. Again, very happy about this, just hasn’t all hit.

Also, I start grad school in just over a month. It’s all very weird. I’ve been out of school for so long that it is strange to look at the books I will be reading and studying and writing about and fretting over grades. But being a student isn’t the hard part. I will also be a teacher at the same time. And not to bratty 8th graders or know it all high school sophomores.

To college students. Students not much younger than me, and some possibly older than me. And my professors? They will be my colleagues. I will attend faculty meetings and hear office gossip. Being on both sides of the fence might be a bit of an adjustment for me.

And then there’s the fact that I’m currently a married woman living alone.

Mr. A and I have done long distance when we were dating, but that’s exactly it. We were dating. Now, we’re married with a joint bank account and shared responsibilities and shared items.

But I’ve been feeling like I just have an occasional weekend houseguest that already knows where the towels are and how I like my wine.

And I’m kind of afraid that since I’m moving us into the new apartment and that I will be the one setting it up and decorating and making decisions about where things will go and how the flow of the apartment will flow, that I’m going to feel some sense of claim to it. It won’t feel like ours, but instead, mine and when he comes home in August, I will get perturbed if he tries to move things or messes up my routine or schedule.

The worst part is just going to be not seeing him for weeks at a time. Luckily, I get to visit him and the second half will be spent in graduate assistantship training, so I should be kept busy and won’t be too lonely, but I know the first two weeks will be rough.

So for now, as I watch Sex and the City the show for the first time, and pack boxes and plan out my move, I will live in my surreal state and just try to enjoy it. I mean when else could I watch hours of this show, drink wine, take bubble baths, read books, and lounge around in yoga pants?

A Weekend Update

This past weekend, Mr. A came home and, for once, I didn’t have to work the whole time. We hadn’t seen each other for about a week and a half, so it was nice to have him home with me, even though he moves things when he’s not the one living here…ahem.

And because I have apparently been living under a rock, we bought a webcam for my computer since Mr. A’s has one built in. We figured with him being gone for 7 weeks, it would be nice to get to see each other’s faces, even if it was just for a little bit when we talk at night.

Well, we tried it out last week.

You guys. It’s so much fun!

I had never Skyped before and never had anyone that was far enough away that it made sense to use it. Well, it’s a blast. Except I had to keep reminding myself that he could see me when I zoned out and would be tweeting or watching tv. And apparently I make funny faces and don’t realize it.

Downside? We usually talk right before which ever one of us is going to bed earlier, so I don’t look all that cute with my makeup off, hair usually in a ponytail, and my pajamas. Might need to work on being a little cuter for our video chats from now on.

But back to the weekend…

Friday, Mr. A’s boss was incredibly nice and since he knew he was coming home, let him leave early, so instead of getting here at 7, he shoed up at the door at 4:30, which was a very nice surprise. Except I was planning on cleaning up a little more, but oh well.

We headed out to dinner and had some drinks, which is always appreciated. We have also discovered that we both like flavored vodka with tonic, so as a way to save a little money on going out for drinks, we went and picked out a flavor we both like and headed home since he had a long day. My favorite bar makes their own infused vodkas, so I think I’m going to try adding some fresh fruit and letting it soak and see how that goes.

It was great to sleep in on Saturday, but I did miss having the whole bed to myself. And I think Mr. A forgot how to sleep with someone else in the bed since he kept trying to take my pillow and trying to push me out of the bed. We may have some adjustments to make when he’s back for good in August.

Our plan was to go grab some lunch and then go to one of the local wineries. They were showing the Belmont Stakes and having giveaways and such, so we thought it would make for a fun day. We had lunch and went to the store to pick up some cheese and crackers. We stopped by home to pack up and then Mr. A decided that he wanted to rest for a bit.

Well, of course, when we were finally leaving and heading to the winery, the sky turned a scary gray color and we decided that we didn’t want to get out there, get set up, and then it start pouring on our heads, so we ran by the store and bought a bottle of my favorite wine from that winery, and headed home. We made a makeshift picnic in our living room. Day drinking commenced and I may or may not have finished the entire bottle of wine on my own while Mr. A drank bourbon and diet. And I may or may not have gotten day drunk. Which may or may not be my favorite thing. 🙂

We had plans to go see the new X-Men, but after eating some dinner and our buzzes wearing off, we thought we would be struggling to stay awake and decided to save our money.

This weekend was basically me learning that we’re old and like hanging out at home. I’m hoping we can get a little more exciting this fall when we aren’t trying to still figure everything out about the town.

Today, I had to work a short shift, so Mr. A waited for me to get off and we grabbed an early dinner before he headed back to Mville.

And now that I’ve typed this all out, it really wasn’t all that exciting of a weekend, but I was so happy to have him home and for us to get to spend some time together at home. It seems like all the other weekends we have been gone to STL or somewhere and spent a good chunk of time on the road, so it was nice to just be a little more relaxed.

And I think when he’s in Other State, I will be craving a lazy night at home.

Home Alone

So I’ve talked a lot about the fact that Mr. A is gone this summer.

I’ve blogged it. I’ve tweeted it.

I’m working on not tweeting it constantly because seriously, none of you want to keep read 140 character laments about missing my husband. Eventually you would start rolling your eyes and telling me to get a life. So I’m trying to keep the “missing him” tweets to a minimum. You’re welcome.

Some of you have been very sweet and asking how I’m doing and all that and I thought I’d fill you all in on what it’s like to be living alone for the first time in my life. (I lived in a dorm with 300 other people around me and then when I moved off campus, it was a four bedroom apartment, so I’ve never lived truly on my own before.)

Strangely? I kind of like it.

But shhhhhh.

I feel guilty saying it.

And I do miss my husband. A lot, actually. He’s my best friend and about the only person I know that I can spend days and days with and not want to scream. That’s true love folks.

But I like coming home and having the place to myself and to do what I want. Not like Mr. A tells me I can’t do anything, but I guess just the feeling of not worrying about anyone else’s time frame or schedule or mood is nice. If I’m cranky after work, I can just come home and veg on the couch and not talk to anyone.

I’ve also been much better about keeping the apartment straightened up now that I’m home alone. No idea what this means since Mr. A is the neater one so you’d think I’d be more concerned with neatness when he’s home. Who knows. But the fridge and freezer are cleaned out and the bathroom is all shiny and my clothes are put away. Maybe I just have too much free time.

I should be working on packing. I should be going through the bags and boxes that never got unpacked when we moved here, so obviously those things just need to be donated or tossed because if I haven’t touched it or missed it in a year, then I’m not taking it to the new apartment. Don’t need to start off the new place with clutter. Please don’t report me to Hoarders.

Also, since packing will mostly be left up to me, I need to start working on it now so on moving day, Mr. A and I just have to move big stuff and we can get things put away quickly so all of the unpacking isn’t left to me. I don’t unpack well. (See: boxes and bags that haven’t been touched in a year…)

I’ve been watching a fair amount of Netflix. This would be awesome except that during my 5 months unemployment stint, I watched Netflix all day long, so the shows and movies that I still want to watch are limited. I need some more shows to be added so I have something new to watch.

A current downfall of being home alone is that I’m fairly jumpy and it doesn’t take much for me to be scared.

And the fact that a new neighbor moved in and he has an ankle bracelet doesn’t help me. I have to keep reminding myself that the crime couldn’t have been too bad or he would be in jail, let alone be allowed to move to a new apartment.

I also check that the front door is locked all the time. Never had a problem since living here, but knowing that I don’t have Mr. A here as an extra protection, I’m probably overly cautious.

So all in all, being home alone hasn’t been too bad.

BUT, I’ve gotten to see Mr. A on the weekends. Last week, I went to Mville with him after our anniversary weekend because I was off Tuesday and Wednesday. Next week, I’m off Tues-Thurs, so I will be heading there after work Monday and then driving up before work on Friday. So it’s not like we don’t see each other.

I think when he goes to Other State in July, then it will be different.

We went to Best Buy tonight and bought a webcam so we can video chat when he’s gone. He also wants me to put together our digital picture frame so he can take it with him.

Might sound bad, but I think he’s having a harder time with being apart than I am. We were apart for almost a year and a half while we were dating, and I was the one that was gone, so to me, a summer of separation with a few visits and knowing I will go visit him in Other State makes it not so hard on me. He’s been working his butt off at the firm, and while he loves the work, I think being stressed makes him wish he got to come home to his wife instead of his mom and brother.

That’s where we are. As I look around I realize that I have a lot of packing and I MUST start this week. This is going to be a beast to do alone. Anyone want to come help? I’ll supply margaritas and food? I’ll even make you your dessert of choice? Any takers? Bueler?

An Amazing Year

Today, I celebrate my very first (and only first) wedding anniversary.

I married my absolute best friend.

To this day, I still wouldn’t change anything about our wedding day. I get all smiley and nostalgic just thinking about that day.

It was a beautiful early summer day.  Blue skies. Warm, bordering on hot, weather, and all our friends and family surrounded us as we committed our lives to each other.

But that was a year ago. And believe me, A LOT has happened in this last year.

Those of you who have been reading since then, you’ve been following my journey and seen all the ups and downs.

There are times I think that we experienced more than other newlyweds, but then again, I think I just wasn’t expecting all the new challenges that were to come.

We moved to Ctown in July since Mr. A would be starting law school in August. This would be the first time we, as a couple, had a place. I had basically lived with him since January, but I still had my own apartment for those days when I was stressed or upset or just needed some space. But moving into a small two bedroom apartment kind of eliminates the chance for separate space.

This was also the first time Mr. A had moved away from his hometown. Since he attended undergrad in Mville, he had always lived close to his parents and family. Now, I’m in no way saying Mr. A wasn’t independent, but he was always used to having that family support system no more than 5 minutes away. When weather was rough, or he wanted a home cooked meal, or even just to do free laundry, he could always come home. So it was an adjustment for him as well.

Our relationship has always been strong. We talk about problems and we work through them. But poor Mr. A is kind of a neat freak and he just happened to marry a girl who was used to living out of duffel bags and was a little messy. Clothes in closets and drawers was a bit of a foreign concept to me. We had more roommate issues than anything. Cleaning up. Doing chores. Those kinds of things.

During all of this, I was looking for a teaching job. I had some experience, not much, but some. I had glowing recommendations. And I was eager and new and ready to work. Unfortunately, I graduated with an education degree at the worst possible time.

So I moved on. I figured, okay, teaching isn’t going to happen this year, but I’m smart and have a good resume, I will find another good job easily.

Yeah, not so much.

I was unemployed for nearly 5 months. It was a terrible 5 months. I won’t go into it all, you can read all those posts if you want, but it killed my self esteem and I was a wreck.

All the while, Mr. A started law school and could really have used a wife that was in a better state to be more supportive. I tried, and I was good at it at first, but quickly it all unraveled, and he was trying to keep me from falling apart.

I finally found a job, but not a good one. I was underemployed and working in retail, which is the worst possible job ever. (Might be exaggerating, but it’s definitely the worst job that I’ve ever had.) I was happy to be working again, but that quickly faded when I was being treated like crap. I have a new found respect for anyone working in retail and I am as nice as possible to all of them.

Mr. A then got pretty sick during his second semester of law school. This involved lots of doctor’s visits, 5 small surgeries, and one horrible night in the emergency room. Luckily, he is doing great now, but it was a lot to handle at the time, especially when he was still a first year law student.

Finally, he finished his first year. And not only finished, but has two truly amazing summer positions that will give him such fantastic experience and connections that I can’t even express in words how proud of him I am.

And while, yes, I am still currently working in retail, my last day will be in early July. And in August, I will start working on my M.A. in English literature. And not only that, the school has offered me a graduate assistantship that has me teaching two English 101 classes and in exchange, they pay for my graduate school. I am finally working my way back to being proud of myself and I cannot wait for this next chapter of my career to begin.

And through all of these ups and downs, my husband has been there for me. We have grown as a couple. We are closer and have learned to rely on each other. We support each other 100%. We stand by one another and give words of encouragement on those days that it seems impossible to keep going.

My husband is everything to me. And no, this doesn’t mean that I just do whatever he says or that I can’t have a life without him. Believe me, he will be the first to tell you that I do not give in easily or without a fight. And I’ve actually enjoyed having some time alone. Everyone needs time to themselves and I’m using this time to rejuvenate before the fall.

But I do miss him while he’s gone and I couldn’t be more excited to spend many many more years with him. And while this first year was a doozy, I think this next year will be great for us as we learn even more about each other and grow together as a couple.

Happy first anniversary to us. I think we will toast with a well deserved glass of champagne.

Domestic Goddess in Training

I am not domestic. I’ve said it a hundred times on this blog. I hate cleaning. I can cook, but I don’t really enjoy it and I’m not good with just making up recipes. I would love to decorate, but since I knew we were leaving in a year, I didn’t put much on the walls here. So apparently nesting isn’t my thing either. I’m a little messy. Not dirty messy, but clothes and such messy. I don’t go on cleaning binges. Cleaning doesn’t help me relieve stress. I’ve always loved to bake, but I have to be in the mood and sometimes get flustered when I don’t know what a recipe wants me to do.

But, I’m working on it.

Last semester (and yes, because of law school, and soon to be grad school, I still count our lives in semesters. Can’t wait for THAT to end), while I was unemployed, I tried my hand at meal planning and cooking new recipes. I had the free time and thought I should do it since Mr. A was in school.

I liked it sometimes, but meal planning was hard for me and such a pain in the butt. I wasn’t good at creating a meal plan that contained similar items, so I would end up spending a small fortune on ingredients that i would use for one meal and then it would go bad. And we were on a limited budget, so spending $150 a week just on groceries wasn’t going to work.

But I enjoyed cooking some meals. The beer braised beef recipe was delicious. Melissa’s bruschetta recipe is still a staple in our house. (Add some goat cheese for a different twist. But her directions are flawless!) Life of a Doctor’s Wife guacamole is fantastic. Spicy turkey sloppy joes are one of my favorite.

But then I got a job. Worked weird hours. And so meal planning and extravagant meals ended. Lots of frozen things were cooked.

But now, that I’m home alone most days, I have this weird desire to cook again. My husband is a really fantastic cook. He created an amazing curried chicken penne dish from scratch and without a recipe. I think I might want to try new recipes again when I’m home alone so that I don’t feel the pressure to make something wonderful for him. If it’s bad and it’s just me, then I can make some mac and cheese and move on.

Also, I’m trying to eat healthier. I know I can’t cut out carbs, at least not entirely. When I tried the first two weeks of South Beach, my husband said I was the meanest person ever and very quickly wanted to shove a loaf of bread down my throat so I would calm down.

But I’m making small changes.

Like tonight’s dinner. It’s whole wheat hamburger helper stroganoff with ground turkey. It’s really good and cutting out a lot of the fat and other things. I still shouldn’t eat the whole thing, but it’s a start.

And a small tip from me: As soon as you scoop out as much food on your plate that you should eat, immediately put the leftovers in a container, even before sitting down to eat. This way, you can’t easily get seconds when you don’t need them and you won’t be tempted to snack, or pick, at the remaining food. It’s helped us a lot with portion control.

Tomorrow’s breakfast will include Greek yogurt, fresh blackberries, and granola. Might even add some protein powder to make sure it fills me up for work.

I’m also feeling more of a need to clean around here since I’m alone. You would think I would be more tempted to clean when Mr. A was home, but I’ve been neater since he’s been away.

It’s all very strange. But maybe it just shows that I’m finally coming into this whole being married thing. We’ve had the relationship part down. I just needed to work on realizing that I no longer live in a dorm room. Basically, I needed to grow up some.

But don’t worry. I would still eat popcorn for dinner if I wasn’t so aggravated with my pant size.

Also, what are your favorite recipes? Tips? Ideas? Were you always a domestic goddess, or did you have to work at it like me?

Something Fun

And we’re off on our crazy adventure of a summer.

Mr. A has worked very hard this semester. On top of backstabbings and general first year stress, Mr. A also had some pretty rough health problems flare up. I think he had something like 5 or 6 small surgeries/procedures where he had to be put under general anesthesia. And that’s not even counting the 8 hour night in the emergency room and the doctor’s visits and the general not feeling well for much of the first part of the semester.

I felt he deserved a small little token of my appreciation.

I bought him a couple of his favorite cigars and some crafts beers and took him out to dinner. I wanted him to have a couple days to relax before he headed to his first summer job.

Nothing too fancy. Nothing that was a big deal. Just something small.

But that’s not the only thing we have to celebrate.

On Memorial Day, May 30th, we will be celebrating our first wedding anniversary.

I have a whole post planned for it, but it has been one heck of a year. And, I think, we both deserve a little fun and celebration.

I had originally been planning maybe going to one of the local wineries and enjoying the sun. Maybe going to a nice dinner.

But this weekend, Mr. A surprised me. He said that we would be going to STL, getting a hotel room at one of the nicer ones downtown, going to a special dinner, and then going to a baseball game on that Monday, exactly as we did one year earlier. The fun of getting married around a holiday is getting extra days off to spend time together.

Since I had an e-mail with a discount to book a hotel through one of the booking websites, Mr. A asked me to book the room. He mentioned a couple hotels- one we’ve been to and loved, and another very nice one. I started looking at prices and upgrades and what was available. And then it hit me. Why not go back to the hotel we stayed at on our wedding night?

Through the travel site, the hotel was a little more than we were planning on spending. We may want to have a nice weekend, but we can’t just splurge and spend all our money on extravagant hotel suites.

I still wanted to see if it was possible, and lucky me, the hotel’s website had a special going on and I got the room for a deal.

So so so excited. The room and hotel was amazing. And now I have a surprise for Mr. A since he doesn’t know where we’re staying.

And one other little present.

Mr. A wears suits, or at least dress shirts and ties, every day for work and will do the same for his second externship. He dresses up nicely and actually prefers dress shirts to anything else. So I ordered him some brass shirt stays and had them engraved. Nothing big, but something so he knows how much I love him.

That’s our fun for now. I have no idea where we’re going for dinner since Mr. A wants to surprise me with that detail. I think he’s just thrown that I won’t tell him where we’re staying.

P.S. We’re also getting breakfast in bed on Monday.

P.P.S. Also can’t wait to eat our wedding cake! (Hope it’s still good. It sure was delicious last year!)

P.P.S.S. Wishing we were going back to Mexico, but maybe next year…