Brain Dump

I was going to write this long post about the first week of teaching and all that, but then I have turned into some super emotional dork today and can’t seem to focus on one subject, so here is a little bit of everything.

* I know I’ve discussed it, and I know my friend it perfectly fine with it, but I am still SUPER upset that I can’t be at my BFF’s wedding tomorrow. Like, could make me cry.

* So I of course sent her a super sappy text message this morning. She’s going to think I’m nuts. But hopefully she and her new husband will enjoy the flowers I have ordered to be put in their honeymoon suite tomorrow night.

* The wedding I WILL be at this weekend…eh.

* I don’t know anyone except people in the wedding party, so I get to sit by myself at the ceremony and then be at a table with people I don’t know for the reception. I’m realizing more and more how un-needed I was for this weekend and should have gone to my friend’s wedding.

* BUT G was our best man and is like a brother so I didn’t really have a choice. Stupid grown up decisions…

* BUT, BUT: did you hear?? The groomsmen’s tuxes have RUFFLED SHIRTS. GUYS. RUFFLES. And it’s not 1970. This hilarity of this might make this weekend worthwhile.

* And yes, I WILL have pictures of this and I will just crop out Mr. A’s head.

* Also, there should be super amazing food and drinks. And for the guests, that’s really what weddings are about, right?!

* So, first week of teaching has gone well. I love teaching juniors and seniors. They actually try and don’t want to fail. They also will answer questions and think about things. It’s wonderful.

* Their first assignment is to analyze a political cartoon and I am getting some awesome cartoons in since they had to get them approved. I think these papers are going to be awesome. (Or, at least I hope so…)

* If our secretary doesn’t get off her power trip, I might lose it. The end.

* I didn’t realize until last night, but my dress for tonight’s rehearsal dinner and my dress for the wedding tomorrow are both dark blue. This is what happens when I can’t wear the pretty cream dresses I found since, you know, I’m not the bride and I know I would have been a little miffed it someone wore cream/white/ivory to any of my events.

* I want a puppy. In a bad way. I can’t stop looking at adoption sites. They are so adorable.

* Also, it hit me this week that Mr. A will be applying for his first choice of job type in the next two months. And the selection boards are in October. We might know whether he gets this certain type of job by the end of the year. IN LIKE 6 MONTHS!!!! Craziness. I just hope it all works out.

* I might need some meds to get me through the next 6 months because I am a super planner, but I also get my hopes up and if it doesn’t work, then we are back in limbo and looking for firm or other types of jobs and then I’ll be even more stressed since I won’t have a freaking clue where we will be living.

* Yeah…I will probably have a lot to blog/vent/rant about in the next year. Get ready. My 4 weeks of calm summer vacation are over and now all the shiza is about to hit the fan.

 

OKay. I’ve obviously had a lot of coffee since I wrote this in about 15 minutes. Have a wonderful weekend and I’ll keep you updated on those ruffled shirt pictures. ;o)

Mville

Mville and I have a love/hate relationship. And it’s more hate than love.

I remember being 17 and a junior in high school and visiting the town and seeing campus and falling in love. I had dreams of walking to class with my friends and living in the dorms without my parents watchful eye. Of football games and tailgates and fraternity parties and late nights and just lots of fun.

And a lot of undergrad was all of those things.

But it was also hateful roommates and classes and getting in over my head and being pulled form school for a year and going back and giving up a lot of free time for study time and being an RA and dealing with all sorts of crazy things.

And a lot of the shiny-ness of the school wore off.

I had some great times there. I met my husband and I learned a lot about myself. I grew up and, for the most part, I like who I have become.

But this town is something else.

It’s not that much south of my hometown, but it kind of feels like a world away. Just different ideas about things and how things are handled.

The school also left a bad taste in my mouth. I wrote this long rambling post about the fact that I will not be giving money back to that school.

And I’m used to coming back here. This is Mr. A’s hometown so it’s not like I’m never here.

But today, as I sit here, this has been my first time back in probably 3 months. And I had this weird thought that I would feel all sentimental about this place since I hadn’t been here in a while. And I’m sad to say, I didn’t. All it did was bring back the memories of the incidents and people that hurt me or that made me mad. I probably need to just let it go.

Especially since, at least right now, it seems like Mr. A might be able to work as in house council for the corporation he’s working for now. And even though I have shouted from the rooftops that I would never live here again, the opportunity is entirely too amazing for him to pass up.

So as I drove around today, I tried to put myself back into my 17 year old eyes and see the magic that I saw 7 years ago.

It helps some things have changed.

The Arby’s building is gone and that’s where the Chik-fil-a will be. Zaxby’s is building where the old apartments burned down a couple years ago. One of the old crappy dorms has been torn down and two more new and pretty ones have been built. Stores have changed. Restaurants have renovated.

And maybe, just maybe, if the town can change a little more in the next two years, I’ll be able to call Mville home. At least for a few years. But I will not send my children to school here beyond second grade. Luckily, Mr. A agrees and knows it will not be a permanent move.

Doesn’t hurt that tonight we’re going to my favorite Mexican restaurant for some of the best margaritas on one of my favorite outdoor patios. There’s always a silver lining.

Roots or Wings

This may be a strange time in my life to be having this discussion with myself, but it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately.

Do I want to develop my roots or grow some wings?

Really, I have 2.5 years to figure all this out, but since law school seems like such a stagnant and unchanging time, I constantly find myself looking beyond, into what our life will be like once it finally starts.

I’ve thought that we would move to my hometown as soon as he graduated. That’s been the plan for a while not. It’s what we tell people if they ask. I mean, we love my home city.

I love this skyline and the life full of memories I have here. I love that’s it’s not too big, but can offer just about everything a big city has without being crazy crowded and expensive.

I want to go sledding here, along with the entire city. I want to hope I don’t crash into anyone and just apologize when I do because there’s almost no way not to.

I want to be able to go back to our favorite place and remember when Mr. A proposed here. We love this place and visit all year long.

I will always cheer for these guys. I’m not huge into sports, but the passion this city has for it’s baseball is amazing and it sucks you in. When we win a championship, we celebrate with parades, not burning cars and raiding stores. We’ve been called some of the greatest sports fans and I love to be a part of it.

These are my roots. We love the area and I would love to be close to my family. My mom and I have become so much closer recently and it would be so much fun to live close enough to go shopping on the weekends together, or if I’m in need of a mom fix, just be able to go to her house. Also, my brother and I have been growing closer, and he and Mr. A have become friends. They can go cycling together and we love hanging out with him and his funny cat.

Everything about this place I love.

Well, maybe not everything since no place is perfect, but it’s home and it’s what we know.

But I’ve been antsy lately.

I have several friends who have moved or are moving to Chicago for new jobs. A lot of my friends out of high school went to Chicago for school, where as I went south and to a super small town.

I think I wish I would have gone to either a bigger school or a school in a big city. I feel I missed out on a lot of opportunities and experiences. And now I’m married and feel like maybe I can’t ever have some of those experiences because I’m older and have a husband and we’ll be having kids.

But we’ve visited Chicago and are trying to plan another trip back there. It was so much fun.

So now I’m wondering if maybe we could move there? It would be a big city experience for both of us and maybe more job opportunities for Mr. A and myself. But do we want to live in a condo on the 30th floor of a building instead of having a house with a yard?

I would love this to be our skyline.

I want to be there for this. Yes, it might be chaos, but the whole city would be celebrating and would be fun to be a part of.

I would NEVER cheer for these guys, but I’d go to a game when my favorite team is playing be cheer against the crowds. Maybe I’ll cheer for that other Chicago team. Maybe.

I know this is super touristy and if we actually lived there, we would probably mock the hordes of tourists that visit, but I love Millennium Park. I want to go to the beach that’s right in the city. I love how there is so much offered and it’s all so close.

I know, the winters suck there, but it’s also a hot and sticky mess in my city in the summer.

We’ve also talked about D.C., but I’m not sure if that’s a place I would want to live all the time. It seems a little catty and cut-throat and I’m not so much about all that. And if we moved to Chicago, we may not even stay there permanently. Maybe move there for a few years then move home.

A girl can dream, right?

Who knows what will happen. I guess it will depend on job offers for Mr. A and all that fun stuff.

But what would you do? What do you think we should do? Do we move and settle immediately? Or do we try some place completely new? Did you stay put or did you move someplace new?