The Groove

In May, Mr. A and I will have been married for two years. TWO YEARS!

I know. This is very short compared to many of you, but I can’t believe two whole years have gone by. I still remember our wedding day perfectly.

While it sounds cliche, and some people will criticize, my husband is my best friend. This doesn’t mean that I don’t have other close friend, but there is no one that I trust more and no one knows me better.

To some, we seem like complete opposites. I’m getting a Master’s in literature, while he got an MBA in a year and is in his second year of law school. I love bad reality television while my husband would rather shoot nails into his eyes than watch an episode of The Bachelor or The Real World. I love fiction (obviously) and I can’t remember the last nonfiction book he read. He’s athletic. I’m not. He’s a great cook. I’m mediocre. He’s a neat freak. I’m far from.

But we complement each other. We balance each other out. I’m an emotional person and he typically keeps things bottled up. I’m outgoing and kind of loud. He’s much more reserved until he gets to know people. I bring some funny goofy into his life and he levels me out and instills work ethic in me. We believe in and support each other 100%.

But that being said, we are far from perfect.

And the first year of marriage?! YIKES.

Yes, a lot of that was the doubled stress of his first year in law school, living in a new place, and my unemployment, followed by very underemployment.

We were kind of a mess. And argued more than we ever did. And while we were still supportive, we each had too many other issues to really be there for one another.

Yes. I had a few very rough days where I wondered if we were really supposed to be married. Those were not good days.

Luckily, we’ve finally found our groove.

We are closer and happier than ever before. I believe we have fallen even more in love, or at least, I have. We are communicating so much better and I can’t remember the last real fight we’ve had.

That doesn’t mean we don’t bicker or get annoyed. We do. Remember, he’s a clean freak and I am not. This causes problems. (But then again, if I have to explain how to load the dishwasher again or remind him to get his clothes out of the dryer…well, I don’t know but something)

But in our second year, we’ve figured out how to work through them. We’ve learned not to push all the buttons when we’re aggravated. We’ve learned to not let our stubbornness lead to hurting the other just to have the last word. We can both be pretty strong willed and we are much better at putting that aside and being willing to say, “I’m sorry”.

We both are pretty goofy and the fun side of marriage has been wonderful. We are able to have a lot more fun together. We love to play with Scout and sleep in and watch movies and go for walks and just be together.

Yes, this is sappy. I know. But it’s where we are right now.

Everyday I get more and more excited to spend my life with this man. To have kids with him and travel and build a house and grow old with him. He’s my support when I need him and he tells me the truth when I need to hear it.

I like the groove we’re in. Now I wonder if his clothes are still in the dryer…

My Mean Face

Yeah…I don’t so much have one.

Yes, I can’t rant and rave to friends and family about anything. I can talk all big a bad, but I’m not typically mean.

This sometimes causes problems for me in teaching.

I am easily intimidated. Always have been. I care what people think about me. And not in a “I hope she likes my shoes!” way, but I don’t want people to get the wrong impression of me. I want to be friends. I know I won’t be friends with everyone, but if there is an issue, I like for it to be a real one, and not imagined.

Unfortunately, I’ve been a little too nice so far this semester. If a student said they couldn’t print, I would let them e-mail it to me. If they had an unexcused absence, I would still accept their homework.

I was being nice.

However, this lead to me being responsible to print the assignments so I could comment then pass them back. Students were turning in assignments 3 and 4 days late, but because I had been accepting late homework, I would lose track as to when the original due date was. It was causing me some clerical nightmares.

So today, I had to put on my mean face. Or at least “I’m Serious” face. I made it clear that I wasn’t picking on anyone or mad at anyone, but that I couldn’t continue to do these things.

They seemed to understand and we moved on.

Except today I passed back their first units.

I explained that I won’t answer any questions for 24 hours about papers, for obvious reasons. They get all riled up if they don’t like a grade and they need the 24 hours to cool off and maybe realize that they didn’t do the work. Now, I might have made a mistake. I’m not above that- but at least after 24 hours, they will be calmer when they approach me about it. Then I will fix it and we will go from there.

It worked out wonderfully last semester, so I expected the same.

I guess a lot of their instructors for 101 didn’t do this, and they were not too thrilled and tried to make me answer questions. Also, I got this idea from our program director, so I know they won’t be able to complain about me when it comes to this.

But even better, about half of my first class stood outside the emergency exit door, didn’t realize that it was the exit door for our classroom, and started saying all sorts of things about me, without realizing that I could hear every word and knew who was talking.

Now, I am trying to remind myself that they were just mad about their grade, and it’s easy to rant in a group. I get that. I know I’ve done it.

But after everything that happened with my student from last semester, it’s a little difficult to not get really angry, really quickly.

Add to it that some of the stuff they were saying was just wrong. No other way to put it. They were 100% factually wrong.

I will not let this make me a jaded teacher. But you can bet my niceness is going to be much more limited in the future.

I need to work on the mean face I guess… Being nice sucks.

Pick Me Ups

Everyone has bad days. And if you are someone who never does, well then you are lucky.

But I’ve learned with grad school and teaching, there are some days that just truly suck. There is no better way to put it. But I have to find ways to work through them since I love what I do and others are depending on me to buck up.

One of Mr. A’s sweet things is that he will send me funny videos or pictures to cheer me up. Isn’t he a sweetheart?

I figured that this time of the year people are getting a little restless. The days are short. It’s cold. Summer is too far away. We don’t have Christmas to look forward too. We’re trying to lose some of the extra winter “heating” we’ve put on.

So I’ve decided to post some of my favorite videos or pictures to cheer you up. I’ve done it before and it always makes me smile.

End of Ze World!

 

Dom vs Hipsters

 

Funny Cats

 

Pencil VS Picture<—- Pretty cool images

 

The Closet Prank

 

Giant Water Balloon

 

Last but not least….

Gets me every time….

 

Hope you all have a great week!

Frequent Flier Miles

These next six months are definitely going to earn me some frequent flier miles, as well as make our checking account cry.

Typically, I might go somewhere new or exciting once in a year. Between January and September, I will visit 3 states that I’ve never been to, (and at least one repeat trip to WI), a trip to Chicago, Nashville, St. Louis, and Kentucky. LOTS of travelling.

A few weeks ago I went to visit a twitter friend in Wisconsin. (HI R!!) And while I didn’t fly, it was a 7 hour car ride, each direction, but oh so very very worth it. We had a blast and it was like we had known each other for years. And she has the cutest pregnant belly ever.

I applied, and was accepted to present, at a conference in Boston. I was SUPER honored and now very nervous, but I know that as a grad student, it’s very important to present at conferences and I can’t wait to maybe meet some famous authors too!

Today I got approval both from my boss and department chair for a second conference in Orlando. I’m not presenting, but no less than 15 of the panels fit into my thesis topic PERFECTLY. So after talking with Mr. A, we decided that since I want to start reading for and writing my thesis this summer, I needed to go. (He’s so wonderful and understanding and supportive. I think I shall keep him.)

And these conferences are 2 weeks apart. Guess my students will have a lot of in class work days while I’m gone.

After Boston, we have a wedding of close friends to go to. Then Mr. A’s best friend’s wedding (which will involve rehearsal dinner and such). I just got an email about a bachelorette party out of town a couple weeks after that. I will get a month in one place before school starts back and then we have yet another wedding. Mr. A is in 2 out of 3 of these. So lots of showers, bachelor parties, rehearsal dinners, and weddings. I’m thrilled for all of them since they are very close friends, but SO.MANY.EVENTS.

And those are just the places that I am going. Mr. A has bachelor parties in other cities, one of which he’s in charge of planning, and who knows where he might be this summer for internships and such.

I plan on making the best of all these travels. I’ve never been to Boston, so I can’t wait to just walk around and see all the old cemeteries and historic buildings. Might even try to go to a Red Sox game. (I’ve been told wearing a Cards jersey to that won’t go over so well. Maybe I’ll just wear red and they won’t know the difference.)

I now need someone that owns an airline to either adopt me or just give me some free flights because HOLY COW flights are expensive. It’s insane.

Lottery ticket, anyone?

Visitors!

My brother is one of my all time favorite people.

He and I are seven years apart, and we REALLY did not get along until I got into college. We were just entirely too different and at two different points in life to find much in common or to agree upon.

I was loud and talkative. He was quiet and reserved. I was terrified of our parents. He was sneaky enough to get away with alllllll kinds of things. He graduated from undergrad Suma Cum Laude. I..well…didn’t. He got straight As through his difficult Master’s program. I hope I do as well. I still think our parents liked him more. He agrees. 😉

But, if you are new or forgot, other than my husband, my brother is one of my best friends. He was my “man-of-honor” at our wedding, which was perfect since he and Mr. A are also really good friends. (Mr. A definitely got a much better BIL than I did.)

It’s great to get to talk to someone who understands the family frustrations. He’s incredibly funny and a bit of a smart ass. I guess it runs in the family.

Unfortunately, with our busy grad school schedules and B’s busy work schedule, we haven’t seen each other since Christmas.

So I was all kinds of excited when he sent me a text last night asking about coming down to visit this weekend! We have been trying to find time for him and his girlfriend to come down, but it just never happened, so we are super excited to spend the weekend with them.

We will probably grab lunch at a local place on Saturday before showing them campus. If the weather doesn’t get too bad, I’m hoping we can go to one of the many wineries around here and spend some time catching up. Not sure what to do Saturday night, but might grill here at the apartment and then go out to one of the hole in the wall bars since they are far more fun than the fancy ones.

Sunday, they want to get up and go hiking at the state park before getting some lunch and heading home. Should be a great time.

I REALLY wish they could bring their dog, but he is HUGE and I think he would just be very very bored in our small apartment. Also, not sure Scout would be so thrilled with a 190 pound boxer/mastiff since she freaked out when we tried to introduce her to my dad’s 11 week old puppy.

(This post is much lamer than I anticipated. I’m a little rusty with the blogging.)

I’m hoping to get a bunch of good pictures from the weekend to share with you all.

And since we need to do a big cleaning tomorrow night before they get here, I will FINALLY post some new apartment pictures!

Back to Regularly Scheduled Programming

I went on a bit of a blogging sabbatical. Too bad I left with a strike post. Lame.

But, even though second semester has me reading 400-1200 pages a week, I have a better managed schedule and hope to make blogging a part of my life again.

And I missed all of you wonderful and lovely people.

And the kitten has taken over the apartment and Mr. A and I are now on her schedule. 7 pounds and wholly in charge.

Quick Update:

– I’m teaching 102 this semester and my students are a million times more awesome than I ever would have imagined.

– If you follow me on Twitter, you know that I had a very problematic student issue over break. I hope to expand more, but until it’s resolved, I can’t. Silly rules.

– I’m loving grad school and all of my classes.

– I get to present at a conference in Boston and I’m so pumped!! Also, trying to go to a different conference to make some connections that have to do with my thesis. Meeting famous authors would be awesome too.

– Mr. A is doing great. He’s hitting his groove in law school, and while he’s totally ready to be done, it’s doable.

– Did I mention that I missed you all?

Hoping to blog more regularly and catch up with everyone. Maybe even some giveaways. Gives me a reason to go to Target.