Closing the Chapter

Holy crap, I can’t believe it’s real.

8 months, lots of tears, anger, resentment, and stress later…

I am DONE with retail. DONE. FINISHED. NO MORE.

Yes, I’ve gone on and on and on about this. But this has been the BIGGEST part of my life this past year, so this is what I talked about.

It’s been one heck of a ride.

And yes, while I bitched and moaned about it, I’ve also learned a lot.

I’m much more patient with people working in stores or restaurants. I go out of my way to be nice and acknowledge when they have gone out of their way to help me or work with me. I tip higher and I do my best to be nice and friendly.

I’m also neater in stores and I put my clothes away after trying them on. No, I’m not saying everyone should do this, but being in that situation, I know most people won’t, so I just try to make their day a little easier.

I’ve also learned more about myself. Not all good.

I would never have considered myself an elitist, but when I had to work in retail after getting a degree that I worked hard for and making less money than my BIL who flunked out of college, I think I honestly thought I deserved better.

BUT, I also gained a new appreciation for jobs and opportunities and hard work and, most importantly, money. It doesn’t go nearly as far as it should and I honestly don’t know how some of my coworkers survived on their pay from that place. I couldn’t have paid our rent if I saved every paycheck for a month and didn’t spend a penny from them.

Even better? I’m so much more appreciative of this new opportunity and I will be working that much harder to not only be successful, but to excel and do my best.

But enough sap.

My boss ( my direct manager who I love), had me scheduled in one of my least favorite departments because she needed me to fill in, which was fine. But, then she comes over and tells me that I get to spend my last two hours in my favorite department, the home store. Even better? My two favorite people from that department were working, so my last two hours were full of laughs and fun and I just enjoyed the time I had left.

And my boss? She’s so awesome. She refused to say “goodbye” and we have a lunch date for next Thursday and she is treating me to lunch at this great Chinese restaurant in town. So she kept saying, “It’s not goodbye, it’s see you Thursday!” As much as this was one of my least favorite jobs, she might be THE best boss I’ve ever had and I truly will miss her. Hopefully we can go grab a drink now and then and share some Riesling since we both love it.

And as I left, I was happy. I did work hard today. I was nice to every customer, I helped them with any questions. I wanted to show that, yes, I am moving on, but that I have enough character to not just goof off for my last four hour shift. (I even far exceeded my sales goal! :)  ) Too bad I can’t still get that 20% discount…

So thank you for following along. This next year should be full of fun college kid stories, lots of grading and reading, and a much happier me.

Now to go drink and celebrate the closing of this chapter!

Have a drink with me tonight! I’d buy you all a round if you were closer. 🙂

2 Weeks Notice

Well folks, the time has come.

I tweeted a little mention of this, but in case you missed the most groundbreaking news since finding out Hunger Games would be a movie, here it is.

I. Have. Turned. In. My. Two. Weeks. Notice.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You read that right.

As of the 25th, I will no longer be working in retail.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes. This totally warrants lots of exclamation points.

And no, you aren’t losing your mind. I WAS supposed to be staying till July 8th.

BUT, then Mr. A’s bosses realized that he was much more capable than they originally expected a first year student to be, and gave him a huge raise. Boy hasn’t even been there a month!

So, after  laying out for Mr. A that he will be making FAR more than I would be, and since he works 40+ hours a week and I’m barely getting 15, we decided that I could go ahead and turn in my two weeks notice and just be done with the schedule that is already posted.

HECK YES!!!!!!!!!

So I talked to my manager and let her know that I wouldn’t be staying till July 8th like I had originally planned. I explained to her that I was going to ask for time off anyways since I would be moving by myself basically and then would only be working a couple shifts after and it would just be easier to have that whole week to pack and move and give myself some down time.

She took it pretty well. Said she would miss me, but since I have been honest with them, I think it went better than had I been sneaky this whole time about me leaving. She knew it was coming, but she was also happy for me.

And Sunday, I filled out the resignation form and turned in my letter and now I only have 6 shifts between now and the 25th. Between me and freedom from ever working in a retail store ever again.

And while this has pretty much been the worst job I have EVER had, I have learned a whole new respect for people working in any field that requires them to interact with the general public. I am incredibly nice to sales people and waiters and the girl who hands me my coffee at Panera and the guy who gives me my biscuit at McDonalds. I don’t think I was ever rude before, but I now make an effort to be nice and say thank you because I know how great it is to have a nice customer after a long horrible day filled with obnoxious customers.

So, I will have about a month off before GA training starts, so that will be nice to have down time to set up our apartment without being rushed and then I can go visit Mr. A in Other State whenever I want. And then when I get back, I will have about a week to relax and get my head together before training and then school starting. And I feel like I will need that time because grad school is going to be a big adjustment for me since I’ve been out for two years. And I plan on enjoying my time off. And relaxing on my back patio.

And to those of you who have been here since last year and have me so many words of encouragement, THANK YOU and on the 25th, I hope all of you will join me in a round of celebratory drinks because I couldn’t have gotten through all of this without. You lifted me up when I couldn’t see the light and you kicked me in the butt when I was just being mopey. So I sincerely thank you all and we can organize a cross country drink!

Now to get through these last 6 shifts because I will just be thinking, “I WANT TO BE DONE ALREADY!”

Mville

Mville and I have a love/hate relationship. And it’s more hate than love.

I remember being 17 and a junior in high school and visiting the town and seeing campus and falling in love. I had dreams of walking to class with my friends and living in the dorms without my parents watchful eye. Of football games and tailgates and fraternity parties and late nights and just lots of fun.

And a lot of undergrad was all of those things.

But it was also hateful roommates and classes and getting in over my head and being pulled form school for a year and going back and giving up a lot of free time for study time and being an RA and dealing with all sorts of crazy things.

And a lot of the shiny-ness of the school wore off.

I had some great times there. I met my husband and I learned a lot about myself. I grew up and, for the most part, I like who I have become.

But this town is something else.

It’s not that much south of my hometown, but it kind of feels like a world away. Just different ideas about things and how things are handled.

The school also left a bad taste in my mouth. I wrote this long rambling post about the fact that I will not be giving money back to that school.

And I’m used to coming back here. This is Mr. A’s hometown so it’s not like I’m never here.

But today, as I sit here, this has been my first time back in probably 3 months. And I had this weird thought that I would feel all sentimental about this place since I hadn’t been here in a while. And I’m sad to say, I didn’t. All it did was bring back the memories of the incidents and people that hurt me or that made me mad. I probably need to just let it go.

Especially since, at least right now, it seems like Mr. A might be able to work as in house council for the corporation he’s working for now. And even though I have shouted from the rooftops that I would never live here again, the opportunity is entirely too amazing for him to pass up.

So as I drove around today, I tried to put myself back into my 17 year old eyes and see the magic that I saw 7 years ago.

It helps some things have changed.

The Arby’s building is gone and that’s where the Chik-fil-a will be. Zaxby’s is building where the old apartments burned down a couple years ago. One of the old crappy dorms has been torn down and two more new and pretty ones have been built. Stores have changed. Restaurants have renovated.

And maybe, just maybe, if the town can change a little more in the next two years, I’ll be able to call Mville home. At least for a few years. But I will not send my children to school here beyond second grade. Luckily, Mr. A agrees and knows it will not be a permanent move.

Doesn’t hurt that tonight we’re going to my favorite Mexican restaurant for some of the best margaritas on one of my favorite outdoor patios. There’s always a silver lining.

Quickie

So, busy week around here, huh?

Mr. A gets a dream internship. I get into grad school AND get an assitantship that pays for school AND I get a pay check.

But, life continues beyond these things, so I figure a quick little update on things would be great.

* So, not only will he be in another state as of July 5th (probably a couple days earlier, but the 5th is the start date), he will be working for a law firm for the first part of the summer. This is kind of a big deal on its own because the law firm is basically in house council for a big company, so he’s kind of on cloud nine right now. Hopefully that will help him keep his sanity as finals approach.

* Too bad other job is in his hometown. In case you didn’t catch that, it means we will be living apart from mid May through mid August. Yeah. 3 months apart. Not so much a fan. We did the long distance thing for a year and a half in college, but we saw each other every other weekend usually. And if not, then two weeks was the most time we ever spent apart. I assume he will come home on weekend while he’s in Mville, but still, the day to day won’t be fun. And when he’s in the Other state, no idea how long until I’ll be able to come down. MIL is apparently buying my plane ticket to go visit as an early birthday present to Mr. A. Which is pretty amazing of her, but still.

Also, we move into our new apartment June 28th. He will probably be going to Other state at least a couple days before he starts, so I will be in a new apartment with him for maybe 2 nights before I’m there alone. Guess who gets creeped out easily? THIS GIRL. New noises and shadows and creaks and neighbors. Yeah. I might start sleeping pills so I won’t think Jason or Michael are coming to get me.

* Work is basically unbearable at this point. Knowing I get to quit makes me dread it even more now. This is a problem seeing as I pretty much hated it before. I haven’t told them yet since I’m waiting on my paperwork and finding out when my training for the GA position is. I’m pretty much expecting a shit storm when I do and probably going to quit a little early so I can go visit Mr. A and just have some off time before my very crazy and busy semester starts.

* This blog will not be all about grad school. Promise.

* I also will not talk about how much I miss Mr. A all summer. Every so often, but not constantly because no one wants to read that all the time. Promise.

* I need a new blog/twitter name. I had a fun blog name idea, but it doesn’t translate to a twitter name, or I don’t think so at least, so I need some help. As of May 30th, we will have been married for a year, so I don’t want to still be saying I’m a new wife. And while I will finally be teaching again in August, I’m not going to be a teacher, or at least not in the respect many people think, and as I’m getting a Master’s and want to be a college professor, I think I need to ditch the teacher part. If interested in what my idea was, e-mail or DM me. I would like some input because I am terrible at coming up with fun and catchy names.

* Diet has crashed and burned. Going to work on getting back on track this week. Same goes for running. Apparently depression makes you only want to eat fried foods and lay on the couch all day.

* And before anyone calls me naive, I do not think all my problems have magically vanished with this week of amazing news. Just this week I was so conflicted because all of this stiff has finally fallen into place and this next year should be amazing for us. Yet, I still felt sad and not nearly as happy as I thought I should, or would. I am still working on that and will probably seeking professional help, whether just talking to someone or taking something. To be honest, just talking to someone on any sort of regular basis will probably help me. I talked to a therapist for a few months when i was living at home in undergrad and it helped immensely. So no. Not everything is just perfect, but I think the stress of not worrying about jobs will help me move past all that has been bothering me.

* So, watching the documentary The Cove on Netflix. Heartbreaking and very interesting. Go watch it.

* Going home this weekend for a baseball game and just hoping the weather is beautiful so I can enjoy my hot dog and nachos and my over priced beer in the sun and watch some fun baseball. And hopefully a win. Hopefully.

Enjoy your weeks and send me your new blog name ideas. I need your help!

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Borrrrring

I’ve been telling myself for days that I just need to write an effing blog post already. Geeze. It shouldn’t be this hard.

The problem is that I have nothing interesting to write about.

I started a post about working in the men’s department and how it’s a whole other world in that corner, but it was lame and not as funny as actually witnessing some of the shenanigans.

Was working on one about wishing for things after law school. But it felt wrong and just like I was whining and very unfocused.

Have considered several posts about some of Mr. A’s classmates. But while I say I could care less if they found this and knew that I thought they were a bunch of shallow idiots, he still has to go to school with them and he’s had a rough semester as it is.

So here I am. Another brain dump because nothing exciting is going on. I don’t know anything new.

**This Wednesday when I get off from work, we are headed to Mr. A’s hometown, Mville. (For anyone new, I went to undergrad in Mville and that’s where we met.) I’m actually pretty excited about this. Until last week when she came up and took us to dinner, I hadn’t seen my MIL since Christmas. And while she was annoying me at the beginning of this marriage, I really do love her and she is hilarious. I lucked out with a great MIL and I’m happy to spend time with her for a few days. She will make us margaritas. We will grill steaks. She will fill us in on the local drama of the small town. (Which could be a great blog post because man oh man some of the things that happen there…) MIL, Mr. A, and myself will join in on making fun of BIL’s awful girlfriend and hope and pray she goes away soon. We will see some college friends and childhood friend of Mr. A. We will gorge on sushi at one of our favorite sushi places anywhere, and even more so since there isn’t a single sushi place here. It will be four days of relaxing and I can’t wait.

** I have put our Netflix instant queue into overdrive as we are watching all of Grey’s Anatomy. We’re only on season 3, but seeing as each season has like 20 episodes, there’s a lot of storyline to cover. Even better? Mr. A actually likes it, so we watch it together and he got mad the other day when I watched a couple without him and he made me rewatch them with him. HA! Also, much better to watch back to back so I know what happens next. I can’t imagine waiting a week to find out of Meredith lives or not after falling into the water on triage day. These are definitely white girl first world problems.

** It’s pi day! I didn’t really think about it until this morning, but decided to bake a pie after work. It is currently in the oven and our apartment smells fantastic. Blueberry pie, hot from the oven, with a scoop of vanilla bean ice cream. Heavenly.

** So, sometimes, I want to ask people on Twitter things, but then I get super nervous and wimp out. And it’s usually either about their job or about something they do as a hobby or about something they said. But I don’t want to intrude. And if it’s about their job, I think they probably get asked enough and I should just leave them alone. But so many questions….

** I am in a pant size that I haven’t been able to wear in a while. YAY! Still have a LONG FREAKING WAY TO GO, but it’s progress. And I’m about 3 pounds from a big milestone, so I’m trying to keep at it. Of course, this pie tonight might just set me back. 🙂

**Also, God has a sense of humor. For the past couple weeks, everytime I’ve said, “Tomorrow I am definitely going running”, the next day is either super cold or raining. And I’m not running in either, mostly because I just don’t have the proper attire to not freeze to death. Today was one of those days and I was really bummed to not be able to go for a run after work. Hopefully tomorrow. But don’t want to jinx myself again.

** In a little less than 2 weeks it will be my birthday. And I usually LOVE birthdays, but this year feels a little strange. I know what my mom got me. My dad said he would pay for some good running shoes for me, so no surprise because I doubt he’ll get anything else. Mr. A and I decided he could get something, but it had to be pretty inexpensive since we are on kind of a tight budget. MIL asked what I wanted, but she has helped out so much financially, that I can’t possibly ask her for anything. And I know birthdays aren’t about presents, but there seems to be no excitement about it this year. Oh well. At least it’s not a big number.

** No news about grad school. I’m getting super antsy and religiously checking the mail everyday. Applied for that school I was talking about. Turns out my dad knows and works with the principal since he is working on their brand new school. Hopefully that will help because if I were to get the job AND grad school, I’d take the job. The pay is amazing. It’s closer to where we want to live. And I’m sure the school would pay for my grad school after a year. And did I mention the pay? Yes please. (Also, if I get the job, I’m getting a dog. No matter what. I’ve told Mr. A and I think he’s going with it because I sounded pretty darn serious when I said it. And we had just been to Petsmart during a pet adoption and we both fell in love with a puppy but we obviously couldn’t get him. Sad day.)

** There has been a TON of baby news on Twitter and the blogs recently. And I am so excited for each and every family! Since we won’t be having babies anytime soon, it’s fun to hear about what they are going through and learning things and such. Babies are just cute and squishy and I can’t wait to have my own. In 3 years. And no sooner please.

 

**Also, was thinking about doing a giveaway for my birthday, but need ideas of what to giveaway. What do you want? Do you like gift cards? Gift packs-if so, what kind of theme? Sports stuff? Girly things? I want to help you win free things, but you have to help me with what you people want! I only try to please…..

 

**And since nothing new is happening with me, what’s up with you all? Fill me in.

The Customers I’ve Met

Retail is a funny thing.

I mean, we all go shopping and spend time in stores and, personally, I never paid too much attention to the sales people or other customers around me. I like to be left alone when I shop, so I probably avoid sales associates as much as possible. ( See? Still don’t like talking to people I don’t know…)

But now that I am the sales person, I’ve noticed all sorts of things. Particularly, how strange some people are. Working with the general public can give you a greater appreciation for your friends and family who are “normal” in comparison. And since some people have done posts about the lawyers and clients you meet, I figured I could do the customers I’ve met.

* The Quiet/Aloof Shopper:

I like these shoppers. They are like me. They are nice and polite, but when asked if you can help, they say no and that they are just looking and such. They are nice about it and usually don’t make too much of a mess. Some even go out of their way to put things back where they found them. If they have a real question, they ask. Some are even a little talkative if you can find a connection and usually pretty funny. The only downfall is that a lot of times they really aren’t going to buy anything and are just looking. But, I’m okay with it. I’d rather have nice customers that don’t always buy a lot than rude and obnoxious ones who buy a bunch.

* The Rude Wants-to-be-Left-Alone Shopper

They also don’t want help, but they are super rude when you say hi and offer to help them find something. They don’t usually buy much, if anything and go through your department like a tornado. And as I’m mostly in intimates and swim right now, it gets demolished pretty easily. And they don’t like little jokes and look at me like I’m an alien.

* The Rude but Needy Shopper

These customers are also rude, but they also seem unable to do anything on their own, include decide what they like or are looking for. They demand your help and full attention, yet they don’t like anything you pull for them and can’t tell you what they DO want. These people drive me nuts especially since they are so picky and they can’t do anything on their own, so they buy nothing but use all your time when you could be helping someone else.

* The Old Ladies

They could go one of two ways. Some old ladies are super nice and funny. I love the ones who are still stylish and have some sense of what is still in style and know their granddaughters don’t want to wear turtleneck dresses to homecoming and prom. (I also have dresses in my department.) They love to shop and spend their newfound free time shopping.

But then there are the cranky old ladies. They can’t believe what the styles have come too and they want me to find everything for them. They are just generally cranky. And they have a rude remark for everything. And when it comes to the home store…they don’t know what they want but you are supposed to read their minds. I avoid them.

* The Old Men

The men’s store is a different world anyways. They have many more items that require special knowledge and I’ve been thrown into the department and it’s rough. And while the older men are usually nice, they also expect a sales associate that is working back there to know everything possible and don’t like the excuse “I’m filling in here and I usually don’t work in this area”. I like these guys as long as they aren’t looking for a suit since I know NOTHING about suits. THey make jokes. Sometimes hit on the girls. But usually all around nice guys. And they will tell you a million stories and talk your ear off if you let them. Also, if they look lost and you ask if you can help, their most common responses are either “I’m just waiting for my wife to finish shopping so we can leave” or “I’ve lost my wife so I came back here. I figure she’ll come look for me.” HA! Love them.

* The Young Men

These guys are funny. They usually don’t want help, but they often times look lost. The most fun are the ones who are buying their first dress shirt and tie for whatever event/interview/job that has come up. Had a guy who had an interview in an hour and walked out wearing the dress slacks, shirt, and tie. They also stick to what they know when looking for jeans or shirts that aren’t dress clothes. They aren’t too chatty and like to be left alone. Not mean, just very independent.

* The I-can’t-Shop-Alone-but-Have-No-One-With-Me

These people are super needy. They want you to be their personal shopping buddy, which would be fine if we had enough people working, but we don’t, so this is problematic. The worst is when they want your opinion and they don’t look the greatest in something. I try to find something that might be better or a different size. Being tactful is a big part of this job. It is nice to get to interact with people on a closer level. They will tell you their life story. But if you have to help anyone else, it’s a personal attack on them. It’s a balancing act.

 

There are others. The angry ones. The lonely ones. The teenage girls. The moms that let their children destroy everything in their path. The ones who shop in the store 4-5 times a week and always manage to find something new to buy. They all add to our lovely cast of characters.

And some days I get some truly wonderful customers that make my day. Like the woman who bought me a chocolate bar just for helping her. And then there are the ones I help catch shoplifting and they take off running. Always something exciting.

Now off to work I go. Hoping for the nice ones tonight. But at least the rude ones add some entertainment.

Hidden Blessings

Something I’ve been working on in my own life is being grateful and appreciative for the things I have, what I’ve been blessed with, and just working on being happy in the here and now.

The biggest one of these is my job. I hate my job. Hate. Hate. Hate.

I’ve never disliked a job as much as this one. I was lucky that I had jobs with great hours, few weekends, if any, and lots of time off, whether when I was a teacher or a bank teller- both got state and federal holidays and teachers just get all sorts of days off. (Yes, I may still have had grading or planning, but I got to do it at home.)

Retail? No such luck.

Super crappy hours. I work nearly all weekend, every weekend. It was glorious to have all of last weekend off, but now I’m paying for it with a 6 day streak. (I normally only have 3 days in a row before a day off.)

The pay?

Don’t make me laugh. It’s practically slave labor. Not sure if I’ve said it on here or not, but I would not be able to pay rent and our bills each month without Mr. A’s student loan money. I work almost full time and can’t pay rent. That’s ridiculous.

Even better? They have me in limbo. I don’t know if they’re keeping me. They tell me they want to keep me, but nothing certain. No idea if it will be full-time or not. And if they do keep me full-time, I’m going to feel super crappy when (yes, WHEN) I find a better job or a teaching job. And I know I shouldn’t let that bother me, but I feel like they maybe could have kept someone else who needed it for longer than me.

But, I have to look past that.

At least I HAVE a job. It’s something. Better than last semester when I sat on the couch for 4 months. No, I don’t like my job. But it’s a job.

It helps pay some bills and groceries. And if by some miracle, they decide to give me a pay increase, we might, just might, be able to start saving a little bit of money.Because right now, we basically have no savings because we depleted it last semester.

I thank God every night that I have something. I also pray he finds me something better, or at least that I can get a teaching job for next semester, but I have to be thankful for now.

It’s taught me some humility. It’s taught me patience with people, or at least being patient in front of them. When telling my brother a story about a particularly rude customer who said I must have failed out of high school since I work at a department store and I told him that I just walked to the back, grabbed another associate, and asked her to finish with them while I cooled off so I didn’t go and kick her ass. My brother said he would have expected me to be in a puddle crying and upset. Nope. I got mad and was ready to stand up for myself. Because right now, the only people fighting for me are me. It’s taught me better money management. It’s showed me hard work and not getting everything I want.

So I have to be thankful. I have to remind myself that it can be worse. At least I’m not at rock bottom right now. Looking for the silver lining.

A Little of This, a Little of That

I know I’ve been MIA. I had numerous blogs posts that I wanted to write, but they didn’t happen.

You know that post I wrote about mono? Yeah…it doesn’t stop there.

**So I have mono, and while I haven’t been just terribly sick from it, it has worn me down and I could use a 2 hour nap every afternoon. The only way I was surviving my work shifts was with a super vitamin B complex every morning and a large coffee every afternoon, or for the last couple hours of my shift. And I’ve never been one to rely on coffee for caffeine to stay awake or for energy.

And then, on December 29th, I start feeling really bad. I thought sleep would help, but then I woke up on the 30th and thought I had been hit by a truck. Welcome the flu to my little virus party. Apparently I can’t catch a break when it comes to getting sick. I’ve been laid up on the couch for days. I had to call in yesterday and today. I’m sure work is super thrilled with me at the moment. Luckily, I always had tomorrow off, so I can get an extra day of rest because I don’t think I’m going to have an option as to whether or not I’m going to work on Tuesday.

** Everyone is doing a post about their resolutions. I feel like when I make resolutions, I end up jinxing myself and then it doesn’t happen. I watched this clip on The Curvy Girl Guide made by Barefoot Foodie and it really got me thinking. I’ll probably do it’s own post on this, but I have some serious weight to lose. But I have to approach it differently. I have to just think about eating better and being healthy. Yes, I have a number in mind, but just going for a number hasn’t worked in the past, so maybe this new approach will. It’s either this or I’m sewing my jaw shut so I can’t eat. I’m hoping the first works because the second is going to suck.

** Other resolutions? I would like to read more, and thanks to some book clubs, I think this will be easily accomplished. I’m currently reading 1984 and it is fantastic. Can’t believe I haven’t read it before now.

Also, to get a big girl job. A job I won’t be embarrassed to tell people about. A job I feel proud of. A job that, if I was completely on my own, I would at least be able to pay rent and my own bills. Currently, I don’t make enough to even cover the rent on our apartment. And student loan money will be sparse for this semester. I need to feel proud of myself. I need to feel like my husband didn’t make a mistake marrying a girl who can’t get a real job. 2011, you better get to work because I’m expecting a lot.

Speaking of jobs, I did apply for one tonight and they e-mailed me back with a couple additional questions, which I’m taking as a good sign. Trying not to get my hopes up too much, but any thoughts, prayers, good juju you want to send this way would be greatly appreciated.

** While I don’t want this blog to only talk about work, I will say it majorly sucks right now. And I looked at next week’s schedule. Umm…they have me down for 3 shifts from 4AM til 9AM. Ummm…..no?!? For one, it’s listed under a department number I don’t know, so it’s probably stocking. Also, the hours imply stocking to me. What part of mono and need rest and don’t need to be lifting does no one understand?? Again, new job is needed. And fast.

I plan on writing more consistently, but I need to get better first. I hope you are all doing well and know I miss you. I also have lots of blog reading to catch up on. So no worries. I haven’t given it up. I just need this roaring sinus infection, sore throat, flu, and mono to all go away. That shouldn’t be too long, right?

2010- The Rollercoaster

When 2009 ended, 2010 was full of promise and optimism. I wasn’t blogging at the time, so I don’t have it all written down, but I was excited. 2010 was going to be THE year. I just didn’t know THE year of what.

I started this year as a bright-eyed new college graduate. I was fresh off an amazing student teaching experience and looking forward to finally not being a student. I was offered a last minute long term substitute job. While it would only be until April, it was like a real job. Also, wasn’t the age I really wanted (8th), but still, I found a job as a December graduate.

I was living in an apartment with 3 other girls. Nothing terrible, but wasn’t happy with it really, so I was basically living at Mr. A’s apartment. Scandal, I know.

The first three months were spent driving 40 minutes each way to work. The school wasn’t great, but I got some great experience and some amazing references for future jobs. I got called a bitch by a student. I was told I was some students’ favorite teacher. The school brought me to tears on my last day as the principal read little notes my students had written to me.

By May, school was out and wedding was all I was thinking of. Last minute details were starting to stress me out. My mom was annoying me, but she had done so much, so I tried to bite my tongue and keep my fiance from getting too upset with her and her endless questions and requests. Seating charts were studied over. Calls of confirmations were made with florists, venues, judge, wedding party, and everyone else under the sun. We dealt with people not RSVPing, people we didn’t want to invite throwing a fit, despite the fact that I had never met them.

But on May 30th, 2010 at 5pm on a gorgeous spring afternoon, we stood in front of friends and family and vowed to love each other, for better or worse, for the rest of our lives. I married my best friend. I giggled through the ceremony because I was so excited. I held my new husband’s hand as it shook from nervousness. I listened to my stepdad get choked up as he prayed and cheered as we were announced as husband and wife. Life ahead of us looked promising.

We spent a couple days with family and friends before setting off on our romantic honeymoon in Mexico. It was our first real trip together and we were excited. Even waiting at the airport, in the heat and humidity, we were light with giddiness. Our room was gorgeous and the ocean even more so. I wanted to lay on that beach all day, listening to the waves crash as we sipped coconut rum and fresh pineapple juices, reading books, and being cooled by the salty breeze and refreshing blue water. It was paradise.

And while I will always look upon our honeymoon fondly and with the deepest desires to go back, maybe as a post law school celebration, there was a stain on that trip.

Our second day in paradise, we received the terrible news that Mr. A’s granny had passed away. She was one of the sweetest people I have ever met, and since my last grandparent had passed away less than a year before, she eagerly accepted me into the family as one of her own. We were devastated. Even more so, we wouldn’t be able to make it to the funeral. We both miss her dearly, but we know she’s in Heaven, pain free and watching over us.

The summer of 2010 brought a lot of new changes. We moved into the new city where Mr. A would be attending law school, into our first apartment as a married couple. We set up rooms. Put up decorations and found new cubbies for all our wedding gifts.

Mr. A started law school. We figured out our routine. Well, he had a routine. I was in a rut.

This second half of 2010 has been full of unemployment. The term “funemployment” must have been coined by someone with a job because I will promise you that nothing is fun about it. 2010 kicked my self-esteem to the ground and stomped on it. It showed me that nothing can be taken for granted, not even getting a job. I won’t rehash the desperation, but it was a curve ball.

The last of months of 2010 have been…something. I finally got a job in retail. Retail during the holidays is hell. Also, it seems like shoppers think you’re their personal slave and must be dumb if you work at the mall. Yes, I heard someone talking about me say that I was sure to do whatever they said since I probably didn’t even finish high school. People are swell.

2011, I’m ready for you, and I hope you can beat 2010, especially the last part. You have a big job ahead of you. Hope you’re ready because I’m ready to take it on and gain some of myself back. Just a heads up.

****EDIT****

It’s New Year’s Eve, and I’m sitting in my pajamas, because not only do I have mono, which is strange in itself, but I seemed to have also developed the flu in the past 2 days. Seriously 2010? You just had to rub it all in, didn’t you?