My Personal Trip Advisors

Ever think you want to be more involved? Here’s your chance!!

I need your trip advice. All of it. After you spill to me your juicy insights, I want you to need to research to learn any new tips because you gave them all to me. Intense.

But what is this all for you ask?

Well, this May is a big month for Mr. A and I. It’s not only the end of 1L year for my hardworking husband, but it’s also our first wedding anniversary. And I think both of these deserve some sort of celebration or such.

Also, it’s 5 months away, so a good amount of time for me to lose a good chunk of weight by then if I can stick to my better eating and workout plan. So lot of incentive for me.

Here’s where you come in.

I NEED HELP!! I don’t know where to go!

I have all sorts of ideas on my head.

Chicago. NOLA. San Diego. Back to Mexico. Gulf Shores. Somewhere in South Carolina. Galveston. Las Vegas. Seattle.

See? Too many choices.

I want to go somewhere fun. Lots of things to do, but I’m leaning towards somewhere with a beach or some pretty fantastic pools, like Vegas.

We have been to Chicago before and we loved it. We love the museums and walking around Michigan Ave and just how much was offered. Also, some fantastic restaurants. And while there is a beach, it doesn’t seem super easily accessible since we would have to get back on the El after being wet and sweaty and such, since we would probably take the train up (done it before-wasn’t too bad) and wouldn’t have a car. It would also be a good chunk of money since you have to pay for basically everything there.

I thought of Vegas since I found some absolutely fantastic deals on rooms in nice casinos and the casinos should have some nice pool areas to lounge in. I went with my dad when I was 16 and had a blast, but I would like to go now that I’m 21 and can go to the clubs and actually walk around the casino floors. We aren’t big gamblers, so that’s not the draw for us. We would rather do the other fun things. However, I think other than the rooms, everything is really pricey there, including restaurants and shows and such.

I thought Gulf Shores or somewhere in South Carolina since there are nice beaches, and if we could get a condo on the beach, we could get some groceries and eat in most of the time and only go out some nights to save money. And while I want a beach, I’m not sure these places offer a whole lot else to do which might be a problem. We love the beach, but we like to do other things as well. I’m not on expert on either place, so please, any extra details you know would be wonderful.

Neither of us has been to NOLA. And I think it would be amazing. I think we would both love the cemetery tours and seeing old places. We both love good food and I’ve heard that there are just fantastic restaurants there. I’m no geography buff, and I’m being lazy and not looking it up, but not sure if NOLA has beaches/close to the area?

Galveston came up in my mind since a good friend of ours is moving to Houston, today actually, and I think Galveston is about an hour South, so maybe he and his fiancé could come down for a couple days as well. I know NOTHING about Texas or the area and I’m not sure if Galveston has nice beaches or is a fun place to visit?

San Diego would be amazing. My dad took me there for my high school graduation trip and it was just amazing and I think Mr. A would love it too. I learned how to surf while I was there, so I could show off my sweet skills (yeah right!) and we could enjoy the beach. The only thing I’m coming across is that it seems pricey to stay there. Also, it would be a little too far to drive, but doesn’t seem like a place with trains/subway to get around like Chicago, so a rental car might be a necessity, but we aren’t 25, so not even sure if that’s allowed.

Now, I mentioned Mexico. Seems like if I’m trying to save money Mexico would be way off my list? Not so much. We found while researching for our honeymoon last year, that if you are willing to wait to book it until really close to your vacation date, you can get a steal on an all-inclusive resort INCLUDING airfare. Also, we fell in love with Mexico while we were there. We were in the Mayan Riviera and it was paradise. Also, ALL food AND drinks were included. And while we took an excursion one day, there was enough to do that it wouldn’t have been a necessity.

I have also considered a cruise since I’ve seen some really good prices and it might be possible to drive to the port city so we weren’t also paying for airfare. Priceline offers free hotel nights depending on the length of the cruise, so that would help as well. However, while food is included, drinks aren’t and doing things when at port can be expensive, so not sure if that’s the best option.

So, I need some advice. Also take into consideration that we are in the Midwest, so costs would include wither flight or if it would be feasible to drive there and all that jazz. We would be willing to drive to Galveston or NOLA, but San Diego or Seattle would be a little much. What is there to do and will it cost an arm and a leg to have fun? Where have you been and loved? Any places I should consider that I haven’t?

And if you’re new to the blog and haven’t commented, here is the perfect time when I’m not wallowing in self-pity. haha 🙂

Annnnnd…GO!

Oh, Mother

My mother and I have become a lot closer over the past few years. I would call us friends, even. Which considering how much we fought, even 4 years ago, I would never have thought “friend” would ever have described her.

But it does and I value her opinion.

When I was younger, I thought my mom was dumb and didn’t know anything and I was a super genius and I was getting so much by her.

When her and I were talking the other week, she said she knew a lot of what I was doing, and depending on how harmful it could be, she would let it go or confront it. (My best friend A, the guy that was my “bride’s man”- my mom said that if he was going to be there, she pretty much always let me go because she figured I would be safe with him around. My mom was such a sap.)

So, yes. I like to get advice from my mom or talk about things with her. Even more so now that I’m married, I turn to her because none of my close friends are married and I’m living in a town where I don’t have any friends yet.

She has given some great advice and tips. She’s helped with decorating and how to arrange some things in the apartment because Mr. A and I are pretty clueless about this whole household thing.

But…I don’t know that I always agree with her advice.

Most recently, her idea that I should be doing everything and Mr. A shouldn’t have to do a thing.

Umm…..is it 1924?

I don’t think so Mom.

Yes, I will take over a few extra things since Mr. A will need to study and do stuff for law school, but that doesn’t mean I become the maid and house servant and he gets to do nothing. We are BOTH in this marriage and that means we BOTH have to contribute to the household and the relationship.

My mom was shocked that Mr. A was doing laundry last Sunday and I wasn’t. He offered and let me sleep in some. Why would I turn that down?

Tomorrow, I’ll be doing laundry while he’s at school. And I will vacuum and dust and do little cleaning tasks. I do actually do something while I’m home. (Like look for a job…..)

My mom also can’t believe our arrangement where if I make dinner, he cleans the dishes, or vice versa. That way the person who is making the meal gets a little help. We’re only two people. We don’t have that many dishes to do and I usually do all the little dishes that get left around from drinks or snacks.

I know I’m home right now, but I won’t be forever. I plan on getting a full time job and getting my ass out of this apartment. And when I start putting in full days, I don’t plan on coming home and being Susie Homemaker all the time.

I think we have to share the responsibilities. When big papers come or finals, I will be more than happy to take over all the chores so he can study and do what he needs to in order to get the grades to get the job. That’s the whole reason we’ve moved to the city we’re in-his law school.

I am more than happy to support him and he supports me. We’re a partnership. He may be the one going to classes and taking exams, but we’re in this together.

But what do you think? Even if your spouse isn’t in law school, how do you balance? If your spouse is in a high demand job or a demanding graduate program, how do you handle it? Do you take over everything or do you share the responsibilities?

I’m just hoping I’m not being some super mean nazi wife.

 

Girlfriends

I’ve always been one to hang out with the boys. I’m not sporty or a tom boy, but I have always connected more with guys and been able to form much closer friendships with them.

My best friend in kindergarten was a boy. I was the only girl at his birthday parties for three years. Then he moved. It was heartbreaking. Oh 6-year-old romance….

But that trend has followed me until this very day. I mean, I couldn’t come up with bridesmaids, but other than my brother, my other “bride’s man” is my best friend since 4th grade. We didn’t go to college in the same city ( or even state), and he now lives even farther away for grad school, but when we talk, it’s like nothing has ever changed. We may not talk all the time, but if there is every anything going on, we can pick up the phone and call.

Aren’t I supposed to have that kind of relationship with a girl? Aren’t I supposed to be with my maid of honor constantly by this time and be talking with her about wedding plans and babies?

I mean, I have girl friends. I have a group of four who have taken over my bachelorette party and planned some surprise night, which I am so appreciative of, especially since they aren’t in the wedding. But….

I don’t feel I can call and just chat or talk about problems. I mean, the fiance and I are great, but sometimes he annoys me and I just need to vent.

And now, the problem is about to get even trickier. All the guys that I’m friends with are even in fiance’s fraternity, so there is a level of understanding that I’m taken and he knows it’s not a problem. I probably can get away with being a little flirty because so many of them have taken roles of big brothers, so there isn’t any awkwardness of “does he like me?”  “does she like me?”

But here we are. About 4 months from moving to a new place, where neither of us knows anyone and we both are going to have to make some new friends. Easy for him. Lots of guys in law school. I’m sure he’ll find plenty that he connects with and want to hang out with. Me? Well….not going to be as easy.

I mean, how comfortable would your significant other be if you were out hanging out with guys he didn’t know, without him?? My point exactly.

So, what do I do? I’m sure I will find some girls that I connect to, but in my 23 years on this earth, I have yet to find a true female friend. In high school, I may not have chosen the best groups, but even they had close friends. I just wasn’t one of them. I always seemed to get walked on and used as a source of jokes. I had a “best friend” crush an entire box of exlax into a soda while at a party and sent me to the hospital. Aren’t teenagers sweet??

So, I turn to you. What do I do? Do I forge friendships that I’m not going to be comfortable with, or do I do what comes naturally and face, possibly, problems in my new, and already challenged marriage due to law school? I do not do well when I don’t have friends or people to turn to and I’m not going to be able to turn to the fiance as much because he will be under his own stress and pressures and won’t be able to deal with me and my girly whining.

I feel like that’s what I’m doing now, but I’m terrified. I’m terrified of being lonely the rest of my life. I know I will have my husband, but I need more than that. He has his friends and his own things going on. I need mine. I’m just not sure what to do.

So, I put it you to see if you have any advice. Maybe someone out there has been through the same thing.Maybe.