Mville and I have a love/hate relationship. And it’s more hate than love.
I remember being 17 and a junior in high school and visiting the town and seeing campus and falling in love. I had dreams of walking to class with my friends and living in the dorms without my parents watchful eye. Of football games and tailgates and fraternity parties and late nights and just lots of fun.
And a lot of undergrad was all of those things.
But it was also hateful roommates and classes and getting in over my head and being pulled form school for a year and going back and giving up a lot of free time for study time and being an RA and dealing with all sorts of crazy things.
And a lot of the shiny-ness of the school wore off.
I had some great times there. I met my husband and I learned a lot about myself. I grew up and, for the most part, I like who I have become.
But this town is something else.
It’s not that much south of my hometown, but it kind of feels like a world away. Just different ideas about things and how things are handled.
The school also left a bad taste in my mouth. I wrote this long rambling post about the fact that I will not be giving money back to that school.
And I’m used to coming back here. This is Mr. A’s hometown so it’s not like I’m never here.
But today, as I sit here, this has been my first time back in probably 3 months. And I had this weird thought that I would feel all sentimental about this place since I hadn’t been here in a while. And I’m sad to say, I didn’t. All it did was bring back the memories of the incidents and people that hurt me or that made me mad. I probably need to just let it go.
Especially since, at least right now, it seems like Mr. A might be able to work as in house council for the corporation he’s working for now. And even though I have shouted from the rooftops that I would never live here again, the opportunity is entirely too amazing for him to pass up.
So as I drove around today, I tried to put myself back into my 17 year old eyes and see the magic that I saw 7 years ago.
It helps some things have changed.
The Arby’s building is gone and that’s where the Chik-fil-a will be. Zaxby’s is building where the old apartments burned down a couple years ago. One of the old crappy dorms has been torn down and two more new and pretty ones have been built. Stores have changed. Restaurants have renovated.
And maybe, just maybe, if the town can change a little more in the next two years, I’ll be able to call Mville home. At least for a few years. But I will not send my children to school here beyond second grade. Luckily, Mr. A agrees and knows it will not be a permanent move.
Doesn’t hurt that tonight we’re going to my favorite Mexican restaurant for some of the best margaritas on one of my favorite outdoor patios. There’s always a silver lining.