Step Back

For those of you who have read my blog for a while, you can probably tell there has been a pretty drastic shift in mood and attitude recently. I’ve always tried to be honest and talk about my life in a semi-open way without airing all the dirty laundry on the internet or giving too much away about us since some people are crazy and I don’t necessarily want them to find me.

For newer readers, maybe you always think I’m this sad and depressing. I wasn’t. It probably started when I was about 2 months into unemployment. I hit some dark spots. I shared parts, but not all. I may have been unemployed, but at least we don’t have kids to pay for and we had student loans to pay for bills for a while. Mr. A’s mom was helping and we weren’t going to starve. I knew, even in the days when I could hardly force myself out of bed because I didn’t see the point, I still knew it would get better or that I should be grateful for what we had because others had it worse.

And then I got a job, and it seemed to get better for a while. It wasn’t my ideal job, but after applying for all sorts of places and quickly contemplating fast food, it was better than nothing. Even better? I kind of liked it. At least I was out of the house and interacting with people.

But that has seemed short lived. I’m not going to write about everything. At least not now, not when I’m in the middle of it all.

So, if I don’t write everyday like I want to, it’s just because I’m waiting to write about something happy, funny, or even just everyday goings-on. But I need to be a little more cautious with writing about the problems all the time. Maybe if I focus on the happier events, then it will make things a little happier on my side of the internet.