My Other Life

A few months ago, my migraines kicked into high gear. I had 9 in a month and a half, and for those of you who don’t have migraines, that is NOT normal. Or acceptable.

I found a doctor here and we adjusted my medicine. We lowered one medicine that I have been on for the last 4 years and we added another one. The doctor wants to wean me off the first medicine since it’s a beta blocker and if I can be off of that since I’m only 24, that would be best.

[[Side rant: New medicine is an anti-depressant that is also used for controlling migraines. I am on the lowest dose possible and it is working like a charm. Not one single migraine since I’ve started it. Also, remember when I blogged about how upset I was? Well this happy little pill has a very nice side effect. It has leveled me out. It has made me calmer. It has made me ME again. And I’m not a zombie. I do care about things. I do get mad or frustrated. I still get upset, but I’ve always been like that. I’ve always been really emotional, but I’ve also been a very friendly, outgoing, bubbly person. This little pill has brought me back to that. I am a full believer that people need to talk about their mental issues because it still seems to have a stigma. So yes. I am on medicine. Was it prescribed for this? Nope. But it’s helping and I couldn’t be happier. End rant]]

Now when I started the first medicine, they wanted me to take it at night since it lowers your blood pressure and often makes people sleepy. Me? I got the super rare side effect of insomnia and vivid, lucid dreams. So when I did sleep, I felt like I had just run a marathon. So we switched it to mornings and it’s been fine.

But now that we’ve added this second medicine, it’s gotten a little strange.

I have the most vivid dreams EVER. Strangely, I still feel rested, which is good because if not, then I would have to be switching medicine because I don’t do without sleep very well.

But these dreams…

I remember them too. I remember them for days. Weeks.

Some are very strange. Like, my friend A becoming the President, I got lost in the White House and then Obama found me crying in the basement and let me take his dog for a walk to cheer me up. WTF?!?

But the weird ones are those that are so incredibly realistic. The ones that I spend HOURS trying to figure out if they happened or not. The ones where I sometimes have to call the people in the dreams to see if they happened. The ones where I ask my husband, “Did I do such and such?” He usually laughs, tells me know, and says I’m crazy. (But the good kind of crazy…)

LIke the time I dreamt that I called my mom and said that we would be spending the night at her house when we came for the weekend. We stay there 99% of the time just because it seems to go better and my step mom drives both me and my husband insane. But she told me that we couldn’t stay there because she had a bunch of stuff on our bed and didn’t have the time to move it all before we got there. Since it is common for my mom to use my room as some extra space, I thought that we would just stay at my dads. I was a little bummed because my mom is usually so open and welcoming.

Now, we were REALLY going home that weekend. And I REALLY thought we were going to stay at my dad’s.

My mom called me a couple days after and we were talking and she mentioned washing the sheets for us. I asked her why she did that since she told me that we couldn’t stay there.

Turns out, that whole conversation NEVER happened. She asked if I had been mad at her for those few days and I told her that I was a little hurt, but just figured she was too busy.

She still teases me about this.

Also, these dreams last all night long. And sometimes, they will last nights in a row. And not just repeating the same dream. It picks up where it left off the night before. Again, incredibly vivid and life-like. Even the bizarre ones.

So I have this whole other life. I asked my MIL this morning about a dream I had last night because I didn’t know if we really had the conversation or not. Now the one about helping a girl from high school’s fiancé pick out things for a baby shower? I knew that didn’t happen since I haven’t talked to her in a long time and I’ve never met him, only seen pictures online.

So if I ask you about something that never happened? Just politely tell me that I’ve crazy and I should stop reading Harry Potter before bed because I am NOT going to Hogwarts and dating one of the twins. (But man that would be cool.) Damn.



Filed under A little More About Me, Confessions, Happy little posts, The Others, WTF

6 responses to “My Other Life

  1. I wonder which one you’re taking – amytriptaline? I had crazy dreams with that one, and whenever I’d lie down to go to sleep, I would instantly flashback to whatever dream I’d had the night before. I haven’t taken it since before I had P (and it was nortryptaline they put me on recently, which I also recently stopped), but the dream thing was odd!

  2. Right before we left for backpacking I had the most vivid dream that Adam had taken the girl we were going with as his second girlfriend and moved her into our house. Apparently I was totally ok with this, until i wasn’t. And then OH BOY I WASN’T. In my dream I tried to get her boyfriend on board with how crazy this all was and he totally thought it was cool that his gf was living with me and Adam as Adam’s second gf. I spent most of the dream screaming and crying at people, and in one scene fired a gun above this girls head into the wall to scare her.

    Needless to say when I woke up I was so angry at Adam and the first thing I had to do when I saw the couple for backpacking was tell them all about how everyone had tried to force me into a polygamist relationship. They laughed at me the whole hike.

    Dreams, are crazy.

  3. I have had some awfully vivid dreams, and sometimes had to really think if something was reality. I don’t think they’ve ever been so bad that I had to call someone else in the dream to confirm if it was real or not. That’s so crazy that the medicines would give you those side effects!

  4. I am so glad your medications are working out…especially the one helping out depression. I know exactly how you feel. Like you can see through the fog of your emotions. They’re still there, but they are more clear. Amazing!

    I have always had really vivid (and sometimes VERY scary) dreams. I never even thought about my medications affecting them…silly me. People from my past turn up a lot. And I have the same weird “did this happen in real life or in my dream” thing too. My husband thinks I’m strange because he rarely remembers his dreams and I have these novel-long stories to tell him about mine.

    • I’ve had some scary ones as well, but thankfully, not many. I told Mr. A that I had a dream where I was trying to decide between him and Mr. Big from SATC. He told me he hoped I picked Big, stayed with him for a couple years, then divorced him and took half, the whole time cheating on Big with him. HA. At least he entertains my silly novel-like dreams.

  5. HP always gives me strange dreams. But I am soooo happy you like the medicine and it’s helping – in more ways than one! That’s a total plus. Happy Friday lovely!

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