Tag Archives: love

The Groove

In May, Mr. A and I will have been married for two years. TWO YEARS!

I know. This is very short compared to many of you, but I can’t believe two whole years have gone by. I still remember our wedding day perfectly.

While it sounds cliche, and some people will criticize, my husband is my best friend. This doesn’t mean that I don’t have other close friend, but there is no one that I trust more and no one knows me better.

To some, we seem like complete opposites. I’m getting a Master’s in literature, while he got an MBA in a year and is in his second year of law school. I love bad reality television while my husband would rather shoot nails into his eyes than watch an episode of The Bachelor or The Real World. I love fiction (obviously) and I can’t remember the last nonfiction book he read. He’s athletic. I’m not. He’s a great cook. I’m mediocre. He’s a neat freak. I’m far from.

But we complement each other. We balance each other out. I’m an emotional person and he typically keeps things bottled up. I’m outgoing and kind of loud. He’s much more reserved until he gets to know people. I bring some funny goofy into his life and he levels me out and instills work ethic in me. We believe in and support each other 100%.

But that being said, we are far from perfect.

And the first year of marriage?! YIKES.

Yes, a lot of that was the doubled stress of his first year in law school, living in a new place, and my unemployment, followed by very underemployment.

We were kind of a mess. And argued more than we ever did. And while we were still supportive, we each had too many other issues to really be there for one another.

Yes. I had a few very rough days where I wondered if we were really supposed to be married. Those were not good days.

Luckily, we’ve finally found our groove.

We are closer and happier than ever before. I believe we have fallen even more in love, or at least, I have. We are communicating so much better and I can’t remember the last real fight we’ve had.

That doesn’t mean we don’t bicker or get annoyed. We do. Remember, he’s a clean freak and I am not. This causes problems. (But then again, if I have to explain how to load the dishwasher again or remind him to get his clothes out of the dryer…well, I don’t know but something)

But in our second year, we’ve figured out how to work through them. We’ve learned not to push all the buttons when we’re aggravated. We’ve learned to not let our stubbornness lead to hurting the other just to have the last word. We can both be pretty strong willed and we are much better at putting that aside and being willing to say, “I’m sorry”.

We both are pretty goofy and the fun side of marriage has been wonderful. We are able to have a lot more fun together. We love to play with Scout and sleep in and watch movies and go for walks and just be together.

Yes, this is sappy. I know. But it’s where we are right now.

Everyday I get more and more excited to spend my life with this man. To have kids with him and travel and build a house and grow old with him. He’s my support when I need him and he tells me the truth when I need to hear it.

I like the groove we’re in. Now I wonder if his clothes are still in the dryer…

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Filed under A little More About Me, Home Sweet Home, Married Life

Magic

Last night, I, along with some friends, lined up in front of the movie theater at 5pm to see the very last Harry Potter film.

We’ve had our tickets for weeks. We weren’t lining up to buy tickets. My mom did not understand the point in getting in line 7 hours early.

But everyone does it. Everyone wants the best seats. Everyone wants to be a part of the whole event. A movie like this isn’t just a 2 hour cinematic feature. It is an event.

This whole series has been unlike anything else for me.

I have read these books from the beginning. I waited in line at midnight for the release of the newest book. I would stay up until I finished the books because I couldn’t imagine going to bed without knowing what happened. I’ve reread them and found something new each time. I noticed mentions in the first book that become so important in the end. These books were written so well that I can’t believe she was able to weave such an intricate storyline that the first scene ties in with the end.

Call me a nerd. Fine. I’ll accept it. But I truly love this story.

And last night?

It was magical.

Anyone who has been to a midnight showing of a movie that they have been anxiously awaiting knows this feeling.

You can feel the excitement in the crowd. Every person there is just as excited as you are. There is a common thread running through all those hundred of people. People you wouldn’t normally talk to or interact with or think that you have anything in common with, these are the people you are bonding with.

You make so many friends while in line. You get to know those around you. People will share food and drinks and snacks. People will ask if you need anything when they run across the street to Wendy’s or the gas station for more snacks. People bring games and before you know it, 20 strangers are laughing and and joking while playing Taboo or Catch Phrase. One group even brought chalk and was decorating the sidewalk. They even played foursquare for a while. One group had a tent set up and grilled burgers for people who were towards the front of the line.

In this day when people are less willing to help strangers and you have to be more cautious, it’s events like this that show me there is still some good in people.

And then you finally get into the movie. Everyone is talking and antsy because we’ve been waiting hours for this to start. I normally get so nervous that the people around me are going to talk during the movie. It is my biggest pet peeve.

But as soon as the lights go down, everyone cheers and then a silence settles over the entire theater.

My favorite part of these midnight showings of movies that people know so much about is that when a bad guy dies, everyone cheers. When something happens to a favorite character, you can audibly hear everyone gasp. The entire audience laughs at jokes that maybe casual watchers wouldn’t catch or wouldn’t find it as funny.

And since this was a movie based off of a beloved book, we are all waiting for those scenes that are our favorites. We want to know how they put it together. Does it look like how we thought? Are the emotions portrayed how we expected? Are those lines that are so crucial kept in the script? (And let me say, King’s Cross, in my opinion, was spot on. I couldn’t have imagined it any better.)

It was so fun to clap and cheer with 300 other fans was amazing.

Yes, it was 2:30am before I got home, but there was so much adrenaline and excitement that it didn’t matter. Not once during the movie was I concerned with what time it was or felt tired. My eyes were glued to the screen. I watched through misty eyes during those scenes that just broke my heart. And for once, I was the only one crying in the movie. I could hear a girl behind me crying and I passed her some of my tissues.

I’m not doing justice to all of the emotions I had last night. I know that. I can’t seem to focus while writing this, but this has been such a big deal for me that I want to write this. No, I wasn’t one of the people that dressed up, but I definitely was just as excited on the inside as those people.

I’m a little sad that it’s all over. Actually, I’m really sad. Since I was 11, this has been a part of my life. For 13 years. That’s unreal.

So for now, I will relive last night. I will go see this movie a couple more times. I will reread the movies. And a part of me is very sad that I have no more Harry Potter to look forward to. Excuse me while I go cry in the corner. And look up how hard it is to take care of a snowy owl.

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Filed under A little More About Me, Happy little posts, Just having fun, Pop Culture, Things I Love

Moving: The Aftermath

I really can’t believe my marriage has survived this.

Actually, I can. I’m being dramatic. But I’ve had moments that I wanted to pay for a second apartment so I could have one on my own.

I loathe, just like most people, moving. LOATHEEEEE.

There really aren’t words strong enough for how much I hate it.

Probably also comes from my moving back and forth between houses every week when I was younger.

AND YOU GUYS. How in the world do two young people have so much crap?!?!

I mean, we’ve lived in college dorms and college apartments. We still live in a college town in apartments that aren’t that big, yet we probably have enough things to fill a small house.

Luckily, we weren’t moving very far, so it was a little easier on me since I had to do it on my own. Even better, my MIL lent me her SUV to use instead of my teeny tiny car, and that made a HUGE difference.

However, if I ever get to pick a move date in the future, it will be during the winter when it’s nice a cold. Moving in 94 degree temperatures with 100% humidity is pure hell. Add in steps to the front door and now having an apartment with a second floor, and it was NOT fun.

I started moving on Tuesday, and by Friday, I thought my lower back was going to explode. I still need to schedule my massage…

Mr. A came home Thursday night and we finished moving things. I had basically everything done except for furniture and some miscellaneous things. We moved the televisions and set up the air mattress and stayed in the new apartment.

Also, pretty sure we put the fewest miles EVER on a rented Uhaul. A grand total of SEVEN. Seven miles folks. We only had to put one gallon of gas back in it. It was more miles back and forth to the rental place than between our apartments. We were done with the truck in 3 hours. Too bad they don’t prorate when you don’t use it for a whole day.

We got things mostly functional, but I didn’t want to spend my last day with Mr. A unpacking, so I told him that I would deal with it after he left so we could enjoy some time doing fun things.

BIG MISTAKE.

Yes, I’m glad that I got to spend time with him, but holy crap. Unpacking might be worse than packing.

The kitchen is the only room that is completely unpacked. The rest of the apartment? Not so much.

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This fun pile is definitely still in our living room. Do I know what’s in those boxes? Not really. The stuff in the background is blocking a closet door. Luckily, the closet doesn’t have hardly any space, so I’m not missing much. Someone want a rockband drum set? Because I’m ready to just get rid of it. We played it for a while, but now, not really. It’s in my way.

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These are the stairs. Doesn’t look too bad. Those two boxes are things that I need to take to Goodwill and such. Mr. A will freak out if I turn the stairs into a catch-all, so I’m trying to not get into that habit.

But the first pile is immediately to the right of the stairs, and until it’s moved, I can’t put our entryway table there, so the stairs it is. And they are quite convenient for purses and things that eventually need to go upstairs. :)

And the upstairs.

Please don’t report me to Hoarders.

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This is utterly embarrassing. But this is currently what a corner of our bedroom looks like.

It’s clothes and miscellaneous crap that I need to find a home for. We went from a two bedroom apartment where we basically used the second room as storage for things we never planned on unpacking. We now only have one bedroom, and while there’s more room, we no longer have a room to jam stuff.

And I’m just being lazy and enjoying my time off. I promise it will  get put away. Probably early next week, but only because I’m going home this weekend. I’m in no rush because I know what works for me and how I operate. The longer I stare at it, the more I will hate it and will ensure that I take care of it the right way, and not just half-ass it. It’s a process folks.

Also, I’m coming off of just PACKING AND MOVING all of this. I give myself a week to not have to touch it. Eventually I will need more clothes, so it will happen. (And by shaming myself here on the blog, it will have to get done so I can take real apartment pictures to post for you all!)

So, there’s been a lot of sitting on the couch this week. Yes, being lazy, but I’m allowing it for myself. Do I deserve it? Doubtful. But my husband doesn’t come home until August 17th. As long as it’s done before then so he doesn’t leave me for being a lazy bum, it’s all good. I just won’t show him living room images on Skype. No need to worry him.

For now, I will watch SATC, drink wine, order takeout, and schedule my massage. I sure am lucky.

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Filed under A little More About Me, Home Sweet Home, Life After College, Married Life, Things I Love, What to do?, WTF

About 10 Years Behind

There’s been a new character that has popped up on this here blog recently.

We’re in love. Well, really, I love it. It doesn’t know I exist. But I’m obsessed.

It’s Sex and the City.

Swoon.

And as the title says, I know I’m years behind on this, but remember, when this show was on, I wouldn’t have been old enough or allowed to watch it. Never mind that we didn’t have HBO.

The first I’d ever truly seen of it was the first movie. I knew that I had to learn more about these girls and their stories. I loved the movie. That wedding gown. Those friendships. Mr. Big.

But show series are expensive and blah blah blah.

However, one day while perusing Amazon, I found the ENTIRE series for really cheap. Brand new. Even had a pretty pink case.

I also knew that i would be moving and Mr. A would be gone, so this would be the perfect time to get caught up.

Well, a week and a half later, I have finished the entire series. And even more in love than before.

How can you not fall in love with those girls?

They are so honest. I can see how any single girl would relate to them. Especially since they aren’t 26 and just prancing around. They are older and have more experiences, but they aren’t giving up on what they want from life.

Yes, they have more money than most of us. They can afford shoes that cost more than 2 months rent. Their purses and worth more than my car and the total of the items in their closet are worth more than some people would make in a year.

But they aren’t afraid to talk honestly and bluntly about men and relationships and the other action that I won’t spell on here because I don’t want THOSE kinds of search terms. I may be much younger than them and never spent years sleeping with half of a city, but I can still relate to them and learn from them.

But oh those clothes…

However, what the heck were they dressing Miranda in during the first couple seasons?! She looked like a frumpy boy half the time.

But Charlotte’s dresses and some of Carrie’s outfits, especially as the years go on. I so wish I could just have one of them.

Mostly, I cheered so wholeheartedly for their relationships. I can’t decide if I love Charlotte and Harry or Samantha and Smith more. Both stepped beyond what they would normally do and found love.

Miranda and Steve are adorable. I even like that he is shorter than her.

I’m torn on Big and Carrie. Especially when he leaves her on their wedding day. And when he leaves her for Paris. And when he won’t commit to her.

Yet, there is something that brings me back to them and makes me tear up when they get married in the courthouse in her very simple yet beautiful white suit. Maybe they just need a little drama to make it all work.

So there it is. My husband will now have to compete for my affections with a tv show. Or at least step his romance up a step or two. He should chase me across the world and bring me back. (I’m kidding. But a limo with balloons on my birthday would be nice…)

Who is your favorite girl? Who do you most relate to? Am I the only one planning on watching this series over and over?

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Filed under Confessions, Pop Culture, Things I Love

Adopted Family

Unfortunately, I don’t have a very close extended family. Both of my grandmas have passed away. I’ve never had a grandpa. My aunt and I, who I used to be VERY close with, have drifted after some tough and difficult situations and choices. All my aunts and cousins on my mom’s side live far away and we only see them at Thanksgiving or a funeral or wedding.

So while I love spending time with my parents and brother, I have missed the extended family time.

Luckily for me, Mr. A has a truly wonderful family, that since day one, has welcomed me with open arms and made me feel right at home. His granny went as far to say that I was always welcome back, even without him. And this was the first family event that I had been to. I love and miss that woman.

Mr. A and I have both lost our grandmothers that were very close to us. He was there for me as we watched my grandma struggle in her fight with ALS and he was there when she passed away. I knew what he was going through when his granny passed away while we were on our honeymoon in Mexico, so I tried to be as supportive as possible since I knew he was upset that we couldn’t be at home with his family. I almost hate saying “his family” and “my family”. It’s our family. Both sides are so incredibly loving and caring and open and welcoming. I couldn’t be more blessed.

So I was beyond excited when my MIL told me that Grandad, Aunt B and her husband J were going to come over for dinner. We were going to grill and watch the baseball game.

I’ve missed the family time and just laughing and enjoying company.

And Grandad is so funny.

He is 89 years old, still goes in to work every day. He’s healthy as a horse and only take a baby asprin everyday. Granny, however, was very sick and had heart problems. Well I guess she thought because she had to be so careful with her blood pressure, that if grandad’s blood pressure went up at all, it was a problem. When in reality, his blood pressure is perfect and if it rises a little, it’s a not problem.

Why am I talking about his health? Because he is a huge Cardinals baseball fan, but since last season when our team has been a little rocky and would give up big leads (like we did last night…), he said he couldn’t watch baseball anymore because his blood pressure would rise. Granny convinced him that he had heart problems too. It’s just funny.

But we figured with all of us hanging out and talking, he would be a little more distracted and so he could watch the game.

It was a good time. B and J had lots of pictures of all the cousins and our cousin’s adopted son from Africa. He is precious and love him and wish I got to see him more often.

This is really a rambling post to say I love family, even if it’s my “adopted” family. And I think I’ve spent more time with my MIL these past few days than I did with my husband. Oops? No. Not oops. It’s been a lot of fun and she has been doing so much for us and I know she needs some girl time, so I’m happy to do it. Did I mention that my flight is booked for Other State?

Yepp. I think July might be my favorite month.

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Filed under Home Sweet Home, Life After College, Married Life, Normal Family?

A Weekend Update

This past weekend, Mr. A came home and, for once, I didn’t have to work the whole time. We hadn’t seen each other for about a week and a half, so it was nice to have him home with me, even though he moves things when he’s not the one living here…ahem.

And because I have apparently been living under a rock, we bought a webcam for my computer since Mr. A’s has one built in. We figured with him being gone for 7 weeks, it would be nice to get to see each other’s faces, even if it was just for a little bit when we talk at night.

Well, we tried it out last week.

You guys. It’s so much fun!

I had never Skyped before and never had anyone that was far enough away that it made sense to use it. Well, it’s a blast. Except I had to keep reminding myself that he could see me when I zoned out and would be tweeting or watching tv. And apparently I make funny faces and don’t realize it.

Downside? We usually talk right before which ever one of us is going to bed earlier, so I don’t look all that cute with my makeup off, hair usually in a ponytail, and my pajamas. Might need to work on being a little cuter for our video chats from now on.

But back to the weekend…

Friday, Mr. A’s boss was incredibly nice and since he knew he was coming home, let him leave early, so instead of getting here at 7, he shoed up at the door at 4:30, which was a very nice surprise. Except I was planning on cleaning up a little more, but oh well.

We headed out to dinner and had some drinks, which is always appreciated. We have also discovered that we both like flavored vodka with tonic, so as a way to save a little money on going out for drinks, we went and picked out a flavor we both like and headed home since he had a long day. My favorite bar makes their own infused vodkas, so I think I’m going to try adding some fresh fruit and letting it soak and see how that goes.

It was great to sleep in on Saturday, but I did miss having the whole bed to myself. And I think Mr. A forgot how to sleep with someone else in the bed since he kept trying to take my pillow and trying to push me out of the bed. We may have some adjustments to make when he’s back for good in August.

Our plan was to go grab some lunch and then go to one of the local wineries. They were showing the Belmont Stakes and having giveaways and such, so we thought it would make for a fun day. We had lunch and went to the store to pick up some cheese and crackers. We stopped by home to pack up and then Mr. A decided that he wanted to rest for a bit.

Well, of course, when we were finally leaving and heading to the winery, the sky turned a scary gray color and we decided that we didn’t want to get out there, get set up, and then it start pouring on our heads, so we ran by the store and bought a bottle of my favorite wine from that winery, and headed home. We made a makeshift picnic in our living room. Day drinking commenced and I may or may not have finished the entire bottle of wine on my own while Mr. A drank bourbon and diet. And I may or may not have gotten day drunk. Which may or may not be my favorite thing. :)

We had plans to go see the new X-Men, but after eating some dinner and our buzzes wearing off, we thought we would be struggling to stay awake and decided to save our money.

This weekend was basically me learning that we’re old and like hanging out at home. I’m hoping we can get a little more exciting this fall when we aren’t trying to still figure everything out about the town.

Today, I had to work a short shift, so Mr. A waited for me to get off and we grabbed an early dinner before he headed back to Mville.

And now that I’ve typed this all out, it really wasn’t all that exciting of a weekend, but I was so happy to have him home and for us to get to spend some time together at home. It seems like all the other weekends we have been gone to STL or somewhere and spent a good chunk of time on the road, so it was nice to just be a little more relaxed.

And I think when he’s in Other State, I will be craving a lazy night at home.

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Filed under Home Sweet Home, Life After College, Life in Law School (even if I'm not in it), Married Life

An Amazing Year

Today, I celebrate my very first (and only first) wedding anniversary.

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I married my absolute best friend.

To this day, I still wouldn’t change anything about our wedding day. I get all smiley and nostalgic just thinking about that day.

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It was a beautiful early summer day.  Blue skies. Warm, bordering on hot, weather, and all our friends and family surrounded us as we committed our lives to each other.

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But that was a year ago. And believe me, A LOT has happened in this last year.

Those of you who have been reading since then, you’ve been following my journey and seen all the ups and downs.

There are times I think that we experienced more than other newlyweds, but then again, I think I just wasn’t expecting all the new challenges that were to come.

We moved to Ctown in July since Mr. A would be starting law school in August. This would be the first time we, as a couple, had a place. I had basically lived with him since January, but I still had my own apartment for those days when I was stressed or upset or just needed some space. But moving into a small two bedroom apartment kind of eliminates the chance for separate space.

This was also the first time Mr. A had moved away from his hometown. Since he attended undergrad in Mville, he had always lived close to his parents and family. Now, I’m in no way saying Mr. A wasn’t independent, but he was always used to having that family support system no more than 5 minutes away. When weather was rough, or he wanted a home cooked meal, or even just to do free laundry, he could always come home. So it was an adjustment for him as well.

Our relationship has always been strong. We talk about problems and we work through them. But poor Mr. A is kind of a neat freak and he just happened to marry a girl who was used to living out of duffel bags and was a little messy. Clothes in closets and drawers was a bit of a foreign concept to me. We had more roommate issues than anything. Cleaning up. Doing chores. Those kinds of things.

During all of this, I was looking for a teaching job. I had some experience, not much, but some. I had glowing recommendations. And I was eager and new and ready to work. Unfortunately, I graduated with an education degree at the worst possible time.

So I moved on. I figured, okay, teaching isn’t going to happen this year, but I’m smart and have a good resume, I will find another good job easily.

Yeah, not so much.

I was unemployed for nearly 5 months. It was a terrible 5 months. I won’t go into it all, you can read all those posts if you want, but it killed my self esteem and I was a wreck.

All the while, Mr. A started law school and could really have used a wife that was in a better state to be more supportive. I tried, and I was good at it at first, but quickly it all unraveled, and he was trying to keep me from falling apart.

I finally found a job, but not a good one. I was underemployed and working in retail, which is the worst possible job ever. (Might be exaggerating, but it’s definitely the worst job that I’ve ever had.) I was happy to be working again, but that quickly faded when I was being treated like crap. I have a new found respect for anyone working in retail and I am as nice as possible to all of them.

Mr. A then got pretty sick during his second semester of law school. This involved lots of doctor’s visits, 5 small surgeries, and one horrible night in the emergency room. Luckily, he is doing great now, but it was a lot to handle at the time, especially when he was still a first year law student.

Finally, he finished his first year. And not only finished, but has two truly amazing summer positions that will give him such fantastic experience and connections that I can’t even express in words how proud of him I am.

And while, yes, I am still currently working in retail, my last day will be in early July. And in August, I will start working on my M.A. in English literature. And not only that, the school has offered me a graduate assistantship that has me teaching two English 101 classes and in exchange, they pay for my graduate school. I am finally working my way back to being proud of myself and I cannot wait for this next chapter of my career to begin.

And through all of these ups and downs, my husband has been there for me. We have grown as a couple. We are closer and have learned to rely on each other. We support each other 100%. We stand by one another and give words of encouragement on those days that it seems impossible to keep going.

My husband is everything to me. And no, this doesn’t mean that I just do whatever he says or that I can’t have a life without him. Believe me, he will be the first to tell you that I do not give in easily or without a fight. And I’ve actually enjoyed having some time alone. Everyone needs time to themselves and I’m using this time to rejuvenate before the fall.

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But I do miss him while he’s gone and I couldn’t be more excited to spend many many more years with him. And while this first year was a doozy, I think this next year will be great for us as we learn even more about each other and grow together as a couple.

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Happy first anniversary to us. I think we will toast with a well deserved glass of champagne.

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Filed under A little More About Me, Learning More, Life After College, Life in Law School (even if I'm not in it), Married Life, Pictures, wedding